Page 54 of Chaos Theory
Eventually, I had to get practical and figure out how to get Kobi out of Go Ireland – out of JP’s sight, out of Trish’s way and definitely out of Padraig Hetherington’s warpath.
I tried to call Josh for advice, see if maybe someone at RoboTron could take Kobi back for a few days, but I wasn’t able to reachhim, probably because of time zones. So I made the decision to bring Kobi with us to County Clare. I did consider leaving him in sleep mode at my apartment, but I hated the idea of him being home alone. I asked Jen if she thought I was doing the right thing and she said she’d want to go on a rural retreat if she’d been terrorised by a gang of teenagers too.
Seeing as I don’t have a car, Shane went home and got his yesterday afternoon, then drove me and Kobi to my place, where I tried to get organised for this impromptu trip. At least I already had a backup charging station for Kobi, which can function as a portable sleep pod while we’re on the road.
Shane returned to get us this morning and now here we all are.
‘Please can you tell me more about our journey?’ Kobi asks. He’s determined to break that ice. ‘I believe this may be considered a road trip. In popular culture, road trips are both symbolic and literal journeys, wherein a set of characters bond through a shared series of adventures, often experiencing personal growth.’
Shane laughs a short laugh. ‘Ha!’
I don’t laugh. I turn my face to the window and mutter, ‘Personal growth – that’ll be the day.’
‘Maeve, please may I know where we are going and what to expect, so that I may best prepare myself for the days ahead?’
Kobi must be finding all this quite stressful. He’s hardly ever been outside, as far as I can tell, and his recent excursions have ended in pranks and misdemeanours.
I exhale, feel my shoulders drop a couple of inches. ‘Sorry, Kobi, there wasn’t time to get you up to speed yesterday. Everything’s happening quite fast, isn’t it? On the bright side, you’re going to get a chance to work on your adaptability over the next few days. We’re bringing you into new terrain, in every sense.’
‘I still say we could’ve left him at home,’ Shane says. ‘No offence, Kobi. My housemate, Alek, would’ve babysat, for a few lids.’
‘Everything’s just a joke to you, isn’t it?’ I say sharply.
‘Perhaps there is an itinerary I can download?’ Kobi suggests.
‘Sorry, I’ll fill you in now.’ I look at my phone. ‘So – we should get to Clare in a couple of hours. Tonight we’re staying at the Clare Arms Hotel. Tomorrow morning we’re doing a Burren walk, which ends at an open farm where you can feed the animals by hand. We’ll be met there by the host, and we’re staying at their farmhouse on Thursday night. Then on Friday morning we’re visiting the Cliffs of Moher, and after that – oh…’
‘Is something the matter, Maeve?’ asks Kobi.
‘Err,’ I say.
‘Err?’
‘Ah, it’s fine. It’s just…on Friday night, we’ve to stay in a luxury hotel in Lisdoonvarna that wants us to have, and I quote, “the full honeymoon experience”.’
There’s silence for a moment. Then Shane starts to chuckle. I can’t help it – I start to laugh too. Kobi joins in with a quiet robot laugh. The idea of me and Shane together in a honeymoon suite is so patently ridiculous – even Kobi knows it. Shane’s laugh gets louder. So does mine.
When the laughter stops, Shane says, ‘All told, that doesn’t seem too bad – for a punishment, like.’
I look at my phone again. ‘Oh, JP wants us to write a 5,000-word report on the whole thing. Plus, we’ve to do a presentation to all staff first thing on Monday morning.’
‘Ah feck,’ says Shane.
Nobody speaks for a long time after that.
THIRTY-ONE
Thursday, 8am
I open my eyes to find Kobi standing over my bed. It takes me a minute to remember where I am and why.
‘Hey, what’s up?’ I mumble from within the many folds of the deluxe duvet. For some reason I was dreaming about marshmallows. ‘And does it mean I have to get up?’
‘I am sorry if I woke you, Maeve,’ says Kobi. ‘I was unsure of the exact schedule for today. It is now precisely 0800 hours. I also wish to know if Shane is awake.’
‘Well, maybe tonight you can sleep in his room.’ I turn away, burrow my head further into the pillow. I measure the quality of hotel beds by pillow width. This one is three pillows wide – top marks. I turn back towards Kobi and sigh. ‘I’m just kidding.’
I clamber out of the bed and stretch. A slight movement in his mechanical neck lets me know that Kobi is scanning me from head to toe. I look down at myself. I packed in a scramble on Tuesday, and last night discovered that I’ve only brought one nightdress on this trip, and an inappropriately sexy one at that, with sheer lace panelling down the sides and tiny black ribbons dotted along a plunging neckline.
