Page 87 of Only for Tonight
“What the fuck are you doing here?” I return the question to him.
“Had to get the fuck out of my house.” He sits down. “Angela is driving me up a fucking wall and not in a good way.” He looks over at me while I sit down next to him. “Now, what are you doing here?”
“I think Ariella is going to break up with me.”
“You think?” he asks me, confused. “Why do you think that?”
“I don’t know.” I shake my head and fill him in, finally telling him what Tiffany did and his eyes about fall out of his head. I tell him everything, including the conversation I just walked away from. “I feel so guilty, man, I can’t explain it.”
“I get it, but you don’t know what she was going to say.”
“I don’t know if I can let her go,” I admit to him. “Like, obviously, I can’t handcuff her to my bed and keep her there forever,” I say and he laughs. “But, like, she already moved across the country for me, then this. I mean, how much more can she take before she’s like, this is too much for me. I’m out.”
“You’re an idiot,” he points out to me. “If she was over and done with you, do you think she would have unpacked her boxes?” he asks me and I for the first time think about it. “If she was done, would she even stay at your house when she has her cousins who live here? She would be like, peace out. She’s probably just as scared and freaked out as you are.”
“Fuck!” I shout, standing up.
“Yeah,” he says, nodding his head, “you’re a fucking idiot.”
“Shit. Shit. Shit,” I swear, grabbing my keys. “You think it’s too late?”
“I literally left my house to get away from my girlfriend, and now I’m afraid that she’s poked holes in my condoms.” He shakes his head. “I think I’m going to go and get a hotel room and rethink my own life choices. Go get your girl.”
thirty-one
Ariella
I turn the shower off and get out, wrapping my hair in a white towel before snatching the white plush robe I was wearing this morning. A robe I found on Jaxon’s side of the closet a couple of days ago and have been wrapping myself in to feel closer to him. My body is aching, probably from unpacking the boxes when I came home. I was so pissed when I saw boxes missing that I figured that if he wanted me out, he would have to man up and tell me and then pack my stuff up. I did it pissed off the whole time, which didn’t really calm me down, which is probably not good for the baby.
Walking over to my side of the sink, I look down at my phone and see my order has arrived. Unwrapping my hair from the towel, I brush it out and spray on my leave-in conditioner before I walk down the steps, avoiding going to the living room, instead going straight for the door. Opening it up, I see my order sitting there, right in front of the door. Grabbing the brown bag by the handles, I make my way back into the kitchen, putting the bag on the counter before going to the fridge and grabbing the carton of milk and then a fork.
I pull out the stool and then take a second to ponder eating this here or going to eat it in bed. I look up at the ceiling as I think about him walking out on me. “I might not even be sleeping in the bed tonight,” I remind myself as I open the bag and take out the first see-through container on top.
Placing the red velvet with cream cheese frosting Bundt cake on the counter, I reach in and pull out the cranberry white chocolate chip one. The next one I pull out is lemon blueberry and the last one is the carrot cake. I line them up, side by side, before sitting on the stool. “I can’t believe he just fucking left me.” I shake my head as I open all the containers and then fork the first cake and take a bite of it. “What a fucking idiot.” I take another bite of the second cake, then reach for the carton of milk and unscrew the top to bring it to my lips.
I’m taking a sip of it when I hear the front door swing open and then quickly shut before I hear my name being yelled, “Ariella!” I look to the side, waiting for him to come through, but instead I hear the squeak of his sneakers run up the steps. “Ari!” he calls my name again and then I hear him tear back down the steps. “Ariella!” he shouts my name again and heads to my office before he finally finds me.
“Oh my God,” he pants, his face ashen white as he pants and places his hands on the counter in front of him on the side. “I thought you left.” He looks at me and then toward the row of cakes. “Having a little sweet treat, I see.” He smiles and then hangs his head.
“It’s called eating one’s feelings,” I snap at him, putting the carton of milk down. “What are you doing back so soon?”
“I want to continue our conversation,” he says and I roll my eyes.
“No,” I reply and then see the look on his face.
“Ari,” he says my name in a whisper.
“I’m not having this conversation with you if you are going to just walk out again.” My voice rises. “Or else I’m the one leaving this time,” I threaten him.
“I’m not going to walk out again,” he assures me in a whisper, and I push away from the counter and get on my feet.
“Fine.” I fold my arms over my chest. “Let’s get this over with, then, shall we?” The two bites of cake I just had are swooshing in my stomach.
“I don’t want to get this over with,” he mumbles, and I shake my head. “I’m so scared, Ariella.” He runs his hands through his hair and his voice is broken, his shoulders hang down in defeat and I want to go to him, but we need to hash this out first. Maybe his voice is broken because he doesn’t know how to end this.
“Jaxon,” I say his name as he looks up at me and I see the tears in his eyes. “You don’t have to do this,” I say, giving him the easy way out, even though I know I’m hurting myself more. “It’s going to be okay. I promise.” I swallow down the lump that has started off small and now feels like a golf ball in the middle of my throat. “I won’t use our baby as a pawn. You don’t have to be scared. I won’t ever keep the baby from you.”
“That is not what I’m scared of,” he refutes and I roll my eyes.
