Page 39 of Anathema
“Explain what Alexis? That you were reckless enough not to listen to me and join Anathema?” He scoffed, rolling his eyes. His grip tightened on my jaw.
“You don’t control me. I can make my own decisions—”
“Decisions that are going to get you fucking killed, Alexis.” He cut me off, the anger in his voice causing me to recoil into myself. “Why did you do it? What do you have to prove?” There was a look of disbelief in his eyes as he pushed me for an answer.
“Everything,” I screamed, glaring daggers into his eyes. “I have to proveeverythingbecause the world sees me as some small, weak woman whose only purpose is to be fucked and forgotten; even you, of all people, see me in that exact way. I want to be feared—devastating.” I saw him flinch as my words took him aback while I dug my nails intohis arm.
“I’ve never seen you as any of that,” Eli sighed in surrender, loosening his grip on me.
“That’s not what Monika had to say.” I spat, and his eyes darkened at the use of her name, fueled by so much anger and hate.
He released my chin and pressed both hands into the counter on either side of me, leaning his body into mine.
“How would you know what she had to say about you?” His jaw clenched as he spoke through his teeth. I made myself taller, straightening against him.
“Because Anathema didn’t kill her, Eli.” I couldn’t help the word vomit that fell from my lips; I had lost control of my respect for him when he caged me like an animal.
“I don’t know what Eli ever saw in you. You’re just another stupid cunt playing hard to get—a tease.”Fucking, Monika.
The memory of her words reminded me that I did have something to prove, and I was going to start by telling Eli the truth that he never got:
“She was alive this entire time.” I continued, my filter gone.
“Was?” His eyes searched mine for the truth in my words and the weight they carried.
“Yes. Was. They brought her out for me, all battered and bruised.” She looked like a Barbie doll that had just been mangled by a child.
“What do you mean they brought her out for you?” he repeated, his words clipped and desperate. I was lighting the fuse to a bomb that was ready to explode.
“She was my first initiation task,” I mumbled, my gaze drifting down to the side. I couldn’t look at him anymore.
“What the fuck did you do to her, Alexis?” His voice cracked before gripping my chin once more, my eyes locking on his blue-greens. I saw the judgment in them, clear as day. He was seeing me for the first time as a vicious monster, and I was going to give him every ounce of that truth that I hid from him.
“I put a bullet in her head; that’s what I did, Eli.” I snapped aggressively, raising my voice. The room echoed with my words as silence fell between us.
His jaw ticked, his hand shifted, and I immediately squeezed my eyes shut, bracing myself for what I expected to be his reaction. Eli would never hit a woman, but I knew how he felt towards Monika, and at this point, he had every right to do so.
Releasing my chin, I felt his hand grip the back of my head tightly before his mouth crashed onto mine. My eyes grew wide as he forced his tongue past my lips.
What the fuck?!
Pressing my palms into his chest, I tried to push him off, but he leaned all of his weight into me. I could feel his hard cock through his low-hanging sweatpants, pressing into my lower belly.
“Eli… stop…” I managed to get out between muffled breaths.
Panting, my breathing turned erratic; I stared up at him, eyes still wide in shock. I just admitted to murdering his girlfriend, and his first reaction was to assault my mouth with his tongue?What?!
I parted my lips to speak but was interrupted when a fist came flying out of nowhere, knocking Eli to the floor.
“Motherfucker—” He hissed, hand moving to rub the side of his jaw.
Looking up from where Eli had landed, my gaze was met with one of sheer malevolence, and I swear my heart stopped beating.
“I—I can explain… Derek.” My voice trembled as he gripped my arm tightly and pulled me into his hard body. I caught a glimpse of Dean over his shoulder, but Derek’s eyes never left mine.
Holy shit.
Chapter 17
