Page 34 of Trapped for Her Blood
Zuben exhales hard. “I wanted Ryker out of the way so I could study you, without his interference. And…” His cheeks darken and he shifts his body as if he’s uncomfortable.
“And what?” My voice is soft, slightly hoarse.
He looks into my eyes. “I did want you for myself. I still want you. I was drawn to you from the moment we met.” His gaze drops like he’s ashamed of his confession, and my heart skips a beat.
I’m moved by his honesty, how he’s admitted his culpability for what happened. And also moved by how hard it is for him to confess his obvious feelings. Because it’s still seems clear to me that under all his stiffness, he does have feelings.
His head is still bowed forward. I shift onto my knees and kiss him, softly, finding his lips firm and warm—but unyielding. His hands tighten around my head, and he moans into my kiss, but his lips don’t part, they don’t even move.
Feeling rejected, I back away and his hands drop off me.
Clearly my kiss wasn’t welcome. “I’m such an idiot,” I say softly. “I shouldn’t have done that.”
“No.” He shakes his head. “It is I who owes you an apology.”
Still kneeling, I sit back on my heels and clasp my hands in front of me. “I accept your apology. I believe you’re genuinely sorry for your part in getting me locked up down here.”
He winces. “Of course I am sorry for that, very sorry. But at this moment my apology was in regard to not returning your kiss.” His gaze stays down. “And to rejecting your sexual advances after I fed you.”
My sexual advances?
I’m the one wincing now. My back stiffens; my chin rises. “Please.” My voice hardens with pride. “Stop acting like I was the only one who had an attraction.”
The sting of hurt turns into indignation. I’m not the only one who was aroused, then or now. “When I made my—sexual advances—I saw your…” I glance down.
Once again his pants are fully tented. If Zuben wears underwear, they’re boxers, and his erection looks like it’s trying to push through his wool slacks.
“My current tumescence is a result of my recently taking a vein,” he says, “but I cannot deny that I am sexually attracted to you.” His words draw my attention back to his face. “This…response—” he glances down to his crotch “—is shocking for me. It has been a very long time since my body has had such a strong physiological reaction.”
“If it’s only aphysiologicalreaction—” I air-quote the words “—then why didn’t you act on it the other day? Or kiss me now? Especially since I’ve made it clear that I’m willing.”
My eyes widen. “Are you married? Is that what it is?”
“No.” He laughs like the idea’s absurd, but then looks sad.
“Are you gay?”
He shakes his head.
“Then why?”
“As I told you before, I do not wish to take advantage of you.”
“But you wouldn’t be.” I shake my head. He’s such a gentleman, old-fashioned, and maybe that’s what makes me feel safe with him. Ryker’s abandoned me, why shouldn’t I be free to act on my attraction to Zuben?
“I get that your drive to protect me is only about my blood. I’m okay with that. It doesn’t mean we can’t offer each other a little…comfort.”
“Ember. Your blood… It isnotthe only reason I want to protect you.” He swallows. “It is a great surprise and vexation to me, how strongly I am drawn to you—not only sexually but also emotionally.”
I suck in a sharp breath, as warmth spreads inside me, but then another word sinks in. “I’m avexationfor you?”
“Because I do not want you to expect more from me than I can ever give you. I cannot be a mate for you. Not ever.”
My mind and body are swimming in desire, adrenaline and frustration.
A mate? It’s not like I was expecting, or evenwanting, anything like marriage, but it does make me happy to hear his interest in me goes beyond my blood.
His long legs are still on either side of me, bent into a diamond shape around my kneeling body, and I shift my hands to his thighs, resting them there, and loving his reaction. His muscles flex under my touch and his pupils dilate, making his eyes appear darker.
