Page 110 of Veiled Flames
Using his bent finger, he tips up my chin. “Nevermake me do that again.”
“But—” I blink with alarm. Did I misread what just happened? And everything that went before it? “Not ever?”
“Not like that.” He shakes his head. “Not as if I were drilling you against your will.”
Relief floods through every part of my body at once. I didn’t realize how much I wanted to have sex with Tynan again, until I thought we might never do it.
I slide my hand over his chemise, loving the form of his body beneath it, and wishing I were touching his skin. I twirl the ties of his chemise around my finger, too lazy to loosen them.
“Even doing it as an act,” he says, “I don’t want to risk hurting you. And I don’t want to pretend that I hate you.”
“You needn’t worry,” I say. “What we just did, it felt… Every moment of it felt very good.”
He rakes back his curls and looks down into my eyes. “As much as I hate to admit it, it felt very good for me too.” He shakes his head. “Theresultswere good, even if what drove me to do it was not.”
“I shouldn’t have asked you to do that.”
His expression shifts, and suddenly, even though I’m in his arms, I feel as if he’s traveled far away.
“What is it?” I ask softly.
He presses a soft kiss against the top of my head, and the hand of the arm wrapped around me slides down to my bottom. “It’s nothing, dearest Rose.”
A smile rises inside me. It’s strange, but I’m growing to like Tynan’s pet name for me. But, no matter what he claims, something just changed.
“I want to know what you’re thinking,” I say softly. “But I understand if you don’t want to tell me.”
His fingers trail up and down my back, gliding over my corset. “I suppose I see no reason to guard my thoughts.” He sighs. “Not from someone who knows my family’s reputation. Understands the depths of my shame.”
I lift my head from his chest. “Tynan, no matter what you believe, you are not like them. You are not cruel. Your family’slegacy may be, it might be what you were taught, but what you did to me tonight doesn’t make you cruel.”
His eyebrows rise. He doesn’t believe me.
“It wasn’t cruel, because yourintentwasn’t cruel.” Saxon drilled me roughly because he was trulyangry. Because he wanted to show me that he could overpower and control me. Because he wanted to scare me out of training camp. I know how horrible that felt. The emotional pain and betrayal far worse than any he inflicted on my body.
I suspect the men in Tynan’s family oft do similar things—and much worse—to women. But I can’t imagine it from him.
“You used your strength to give me pleasure.” I stroke his face. “Not to demonstrate your power or to hurt me.”
He kisses my forehead. “That’s a very generous interpretation.”
“It’s not true?” I lean back from him slightly.
He shrugs. “Perhaps it’s partially true.” He closes his eyes for a moment. “But at times I admit I was driven by fury, by intense hatred.”
My breath stutters. My feelings for Tynan have warmed, and I’d hoped his had too. If I’m permitted to stay here at camp, I hope we can remain friendly and perhaps do this again. “Do youstillhate me?”
“Hateyou?” He pulls me more tightly against him. “No. Never.” Grinning, he winks. “Well, not for at least a day now.”
He shifts his hold on me, so he can look more deeply into my eyes. “The fury I felt tonight wasn’t driven by hatred ofyou. Myfury was directed toward my grandfather, toward my father, my older brothers. My entire male line.”
“Oh, I see.” But even as my words are out, I realize I’m not certain what he means. “You were angry about what I did to your family.”
“No. I applaud what you did to my grandfather. I greatly admire how you were clever and brave enough to make your escape.”
“Then what was it?” I look up into his eyes seeking answers.
“The anger I plowed into you—” his eyes flutter closed “—wasn’t about what you did to them, but about all the things they’ve done to me.” He turns away. “When you called me weak, my fury exploded like a lighting stick to dry tinder.”
