Page 13 of The Wedding Driver
“I struggle with that concept. I mean, he says he’s thought about it, and maybe he has. But I’ve daydreamed about this for years and now that it’s happening, I’m freaking out.” Tonya had tossed and turned all night. Every time she closed her eyes, Foster was there, taunting her with his wickedly subtle smile. When she opened them, her mind went over every possible scenario of today’s events. The things that could go right.
And the things that could go wrong.
Sadly, she focused on the latter.
“You and Foster have a lot of history. It’s going to be both easy and hard to slide into a romantic relationship.”
“And you know this how?” Tonya lowered her chin and stared at her sister with a smirk.
Since college, Tayla spent her time building her career. She lost herself in it and had no time for boyfriends.
“I’ve had friends that I’ve hopped into bed with,” Tayla said with a narrowed expression. “The dinner part is easy because you’re comfortable with each other. But the getting naked part can be awkward. And in your case, you put Foster on a pedestal. He might not live up to your high expectations.”
“You’re not helping and that’s not what I wanted to discuss anyway.”
“Right.” Tayla laughed. “Listen. The problem here is that you’ve put the cart before the horse. You’re already in love with him.”
“I shouldn’t have called you over.” Tonya loved her sister more than anything. Over the last year, her bluntness had settled into more of arough around the edgestruth, but she still always spoke her opinions when asked. That sometimes could be a hard pill to swallow. Like right now. However, if Tonya was being honest with herself, it was necessary to accept the fact that she did love Foster. She just wasn’t willing to admit it to anyone else, not even her sisters.
“You’re overthinking all of this. Go into it like every other time you see him. Don’t think of this as something different. It’s just another lunch meeting about work, yet you’re talking about everything but. Make sense?”
“No. Things have changed and I’m scared. You know one of Grandpa’s old sayings—be careful what you ask for—well, that’s what I woke up to. I’ve wanted this for the last three years. Maybe longer. What if he kisses me and I hate it? Or worse, he doesn’t like it. What if the date is so horrible that we can’t ever be around each other again? My mind is going a mile a minute and I can’t settle it down no matter how hard I try, and trust me, I’ve been doing every trick in the book to try to relax. I was even considering taking a gummy, now that it’s legal. But then I don’t want to be acting all weird and mushy like the last time I took one.”
Tayla shook her head. “Yeah. We don’t want that.” She set her mug down on the small table, then took Tonya’s hands and squeezed. “I might not have had any long-lasting relationships until Gael, but I know a little something about attitude.” Tayla lowered her chin and arched a brow.
That brought a smile to Tonya’s face. Her sister oozed confidence, even when Tonya and Tiki knew on the inside she was shaking like a leaf.
“If I let designers know I was worried about what they thought of me and my creations all the time, I wouldn’t have gotten as far as I did. I know this isn’t the same, but no matter what happens between you and Foster, you’ll finally be able to get out of this place of limbo.” Tayla squeezed. “This is a good thing. Either it will work out, or it won’t.”
Tonya inhaled sharply through her nose. The fresh summer air filled her nostrils. It smelled of sunshine and crisp morning dew.
Shit or get off the pot.
All her grandfather’s words of wisdom were flowing through her brain. They were all cliché, but there was a ring of truth to every single one.
She knew it was time.
The fact she finally told Foster she had feelings for him and that they were going on a date was the best thing that could have happened.
At least that’s what she told herself.
“You want to know what’s weird about all of this,” Tonya said. “I feel like I’ve been walking around in a fog for so long and now that it’s lifting, and I can see that I’ve been in a daze, I feel kind of stupid that I’ve waited so long or that I’m even so afraid. He’s just a man. It’s just a date. It shouldn’t matter so much.”
“It matters because you love him and that means there’s something at stake.” Tayla pursed her lips. “I wish you could bottle those feelings and set them aside so you could simply enjoy dating and getting to know Foster on a different level.”
“That ship has sailed. But that brings me to why I asked you here this morning because I feel like this date will either be the door to more, or the end of it all.”
“That’s not true.”
“Maybe not. But that’s how I feel,” Tonya said. “Generally, whenever Foster and I spend time together, we discuss weddings, and I often dominate the conversation. I talk about you and Gael or Grandpa and what’s going on with him. Or Tiki and Lake and publishing. Only very rarely does he ever select the topics. How do I get him talking about himself or have him direct the conversation without asking him a bunch of questions?”
“You could try silence.”
“That only leads to me chatting away about random things or sitting around staring at nothing until one of us says good night.”
“Bring up the last movie you watched that you think he might be interested in. Or television show you binged together. Or a book you read that you know he has. Anything that could get the two of you discussing something other than the usual suspects.”
Tonya really didn’t need her sister to tell her that, but it was the courage she wanted to hear. She glanced at her cell. “Shit. I need to get going.” She jumped to her feet. “Thanks for coming over.”
