Page 24 of The Wedding Driver
He rested his hand on her thigh and squeezed. “Long story short. I ran into her and she started reaching out again. I’m not sure why she’s hell-bent on bringing up the past or why she believes we have any unfinished business. And just to be totally transparent, she’s texted me twice today.”
“Have you responded?” Tonya had no right to ask. It wasn’t any of her business. This was between Foster and an ex. It had nothing to do with Tonya.
He took her chin with his thumb and forefinger. “No. I have no desire to have any kind of conversation with Kathy. Not now. Not ever.”
“Do you think she’s looking for closure?” Tonya understood how important that was to most people. She hadn’t many long-term relationships, but the few she did have, that was something that helped her move forward. “I don’t mean to be rude or insensitive, but you did close yourself off to the world for a while.”
“You’re right. I did. However, for an entire year, I kept telling her that I had nothing to give. I was a shell of a man who’d lost his only child. She pushed and she pushed and she pushed until I lost my shit and told her that if she didn’t leave me alone, I’d take action.”
“I’m sure that hurt her feelings, especially if she thought there was any chance that the two of you were going to make a life together.”
Foster inhaled sharply and exhaled with a big sigh. “She never even met my daughter. There was no talk of us staying together. It wasn’t that I hadn’t thought about it, because I did care about Kathy, but I wasn’t in a position that I felt comfortable leaving Victoria.” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “If she believed that, it didn’t come from me.”
“I’m sorry. I’m not trying to make you defensive. I’m only trying to understand.”
“I know,” he whispered. “It just brings up a lot of emotions and all the reasons that I never allowed myself to really let you in. I knew if I did, I’d not only answer any question you wanted to know, but I’d have to look it all in the face. Even in therapy, I can be somewhat emotionless. It’s hard to do that with you now that we’ve expressed that there’s something between us.”
“I’m not sure I get how that’s connected to me.”
“I was never in love with Victoria. Not like a man should love a woman. She was the mother of my child and I valued that and loved her for giving me Lisa. I couldn’t ever take that away from Victoria, but we should have never gotten married in the first place. We were both pressured to do so because Victoria was pregnant. When I met Kathy, I wasn’t looking for anything. I was half-dead inside. I was doing my best to be a good father. I failed.”
“That’s not true.”
He ran his hand up and down her leg, massaging gently. “But it is. I try not to place all the blame on myself. I accept that there were things beyond my control; however, I made some pretty big mistakes that I have to take responsibility for. The thing is, after Kathy, I decided that my punishment should be to live out my life alone, because if I ever let another woman in, that meant I was betraying my daughter’s memory.”
She tapped the center of her chest. Her eyes filled with tears. “I don’t want you to feel that way about me.”
“That’s the hard part. I don’t,” he said. “I care about you. I thought I could brush it under the rug. But I can’t. So, shall we try another date next Sunday?”
“Tonight could be a date.” She lifted her thumb to her mouth and chewed on her nail.
“I hate it when you do that.” He pushed her hand from her face. “What do you have in mind?”
“That new action flick just dropped on streaming. We could make some popcorn and watch it together. I know we watch television all the time, but it could be one way to ease back into things.”
“I like the sound of that.” He leaned closer, brushing his mouth over her lips. A soft, tender kiss that left her weak in the knees.
It ended way too quickly.
However, the night was still young.
* * *
Foster couldn’t concentrate on the movie, which made him crazy because it wasn’t like he’d never forced himself to focus on something other than Tonya. However, this time she was snuggling up against him, her skin touching his, reminding him that she was all woman, and he indeed was a man. He glanced down at the head resting in his lap. He ran his fingers through Tonya’s long dark locks. Eerie music echoed through the room, followed by the boom of drums as the bad guys broke down a door.
She jumped, grabbing his thighs.
He chuckled.
“Not funny.” She glanced up. “This wasn’t supposed to be a scary movie.”
“I believe it’s advertised as suspense, but it has a horror flare.” He ran his hand up and down her arm. “We don’t have to continue watching if you don’t want to.”
“If you’re enjoying it, we can.”
“I’ve been a bit distracted. I’m a little lost, so I kind of have no idea what’s going on.”
“Why aren’t you paying attention?” She scooted to her knees, tucking her feet under her adorable ass.
