Page 49 of Before the Storm
“Mom, all of us loved our careers.”
“I know that. But Nelson and Maverick always wanted more out of life. They wanted marriage and kids. That never crossed your mind when you were enlisted. As parents, we accepted that you might be the kid who never gave us grandkids. But when you were injured, your world changed.”
“I don’t need reminding of that.” He rubbed his hip. The limp was long gone, but the dull ache had never subsided. He lived with pain every day of his life. A constant reminder of what had been taken from him long before he’d been ready. “I remember all too well lying in that hospital bed, being told my active duty days were over. I resigned myself to a desk job. I accepted my fate.”
“Until your brothers gave you a way out. You jumped on that chance so fast and not just because that was a dream you shared with Maverick and Nelson, but because that position in the Army wasn’t fulfilling.” She held up her hand. “Since then, you’ve gone from one woman who was incapable of giving you love to the next.”
“Are you suggesting my taste in girls has always been horrible?” This wasn’t the first time he’d had this conversation with his mother, but it was the first time she’d gone this deep, and he found himself wanting to hear her point of view.
“They were all nice ladies, but they were all ships passing in the night. They were like you. Lost souls, going from port to port, not sure of what they wanted or what to look for. When Janelle landed in Lake George, she was looking for a place to land. A place to call home. A safe haven. She found it in you. She might not have been looking for love, but that’s the door she knocked on and you answered.”
“I’ll admit that I care about her more than anyone I’ve ever dated. But love is too strong a word.”
“And I call bullshit. You’re just scared.”
He raked his fingers through his hair. “Of what?”
“Pardon the bad comparison, but of being put on a desk job.” She arched a brow.
“What the hell does that mean?”
“Janelle’s life might have been sheltered. She doesn’t have a lot of real-world experiences. However, she has lived through some shit and when she comes out on the other end, and she will, she’s going to be stronger. She’s already showing that in the few weeks she’s been here. You’re afraid that she’s going to see what this world can offer and it’s not going to be you, just like you moved past that desk job.”
Sometimes he resented how insightful his mother could be and right now, he wished he’d never asked because it made too much damn sense. He’d never looked at it that way.
He opened his mouth, but no words formed.
“Life is full of risks, son. You’ve never taken one with your heart.” She squeezed his hand. “Janelle is worth taking it. I wouldn’t say that if I didn’t believe it.”
“That’s a lot to digest,” he whispered.
“I’m sure it is. I’ll leave it alone for now.” She smiled. “I do have some things to chat about and I really do want Janelle there.”
“I’d rather spoon-feed the intel.”
His mother shook her head. “You can’t keep things from her, and I need to know if she recognizes some people.”
“All right. I’ll go get her and a pot of coffee. Go make yourself comfortable in the office.” He slipped from behind the bar with his heart beating in his throat. All he wanted to do was protect Janelle, but his mother had a point. Knowledge was power and Janelle needed both.
“Hi, Mrs. Snow.” Janelle strolled into the office. “How are you this afternoon?”
“I’m good, dear, but how many times do I have to tell you to call me Dina?”
Janelle smiled. “Dina,” she said. “I’ll work on that.”
Dina laughed. “You do that because Mrs. Snow, may she rest in peace, was my mother-in-law and she was a pain in my ass.”
Phoenix laughed. “Grammy wasn’t that bad.”
Dina sat in the chair in front of the computer and lowered her chin. “Your grammy was a mean old bird who never liked me. She thought a woman’s place was in the kitchen. She hated that I worked and thought I was a horrible mother. Every time you boys acted out or got into trouble, it was all my fault. I’ll never forget when you got yourself suspended from school.” Dina smacked her forehead. “That woman came right over to the house and scolded me. Not you. She told me that if I had been home, doing my job, you wouldn’t have even thought to get into a fight. She never once asked what the fight was about.”
Janelle eased onto the sofa, totally fascinated by the story. She glanced up at Phoenix, who leaned against the doorjamb with a wicked grin and a mischievous twinkle. “You got suspended from school? How old were you?”
“That time? I was thirteen,” he said.
“It happened more than once?” she asked.
“That little devil got suspended three times. All for the same thing. Fighting. While I never condone throwing punches, Phoenix didn’t toss the first one.” Dina laughed. “Grammy was fit to be tied, but again, it wasn’t about the fight, but about the fact I worked.”
