Page 14 of Mine to Love
“I think you should tell your sister that it bothers you when she babies you like that. Let her know that you understand she’s only trying to protect your reactions, but that how she’s doing it makes it worse. That you’d rather she just tell you.”
“It makes me so angry. I get I’m different, but she knows how to really make me feel that way.”
“She loves you and only wants what’s best for you.” Miles gave Gabriel a little punch in the arm. “You know, sometimes when we’re different from others, the people who love us the most, in an attempt to protect us or make things easier for us or even to teach us the hard lessons in life, they do the dumbest things. Trust me, I know a little about that.”
“You’re not different. You’re cool.”
Miles burst out laughing. “I’m glad you think so, but growing up, I wasn’t. I was the dumb kid. The one who all the other kids picked on.” He tapped his temple. “Because I don’t process information the way everyone else does.”
“I don’t know what that means.”
“I have a couple learning disabilities that made school incredibly difficult. I had to repeat second grade, putting me in the same grade as my younger brother, Jameson. But it got worse. I flunked most of my classes my junior year and that meant I wasn’t going to graduate with Jameson. Not only wasn’t I down with that, but neither was my mother. Her approach was forcing me into summer school and tutors and drilling it into my head that I was going to be a big fat loser if I didn’t get my shit together.”
“Your mother said that to you?”
Miles cringed at the memory of the words his mom actually used. Twenty-odd years later, his mother looked at him very differently. And his learning disabilities. But back then, she honestly believed someone could wave a magic wand and they’d vanish. If it hadn’t been for Nathan, Seth, and his dad, he’d surely have been a bum. They had been the ones to sit their mom down and get her to agree to let him go to trade school. Becoming a grease monkey had been the best thing that had ever happened to him because it had given him purpose.
He became good at something other than being the dumb kid.
“Pretty much,” Miles said. “Honestly, my mom did mean well, even if it was misguided. She wanted me to be successful in life.”
“But you own your own business.”
Jesus, Gabriel was good for his ego.
“I do. However, it took me a long while to get there between the pressure my mom put on me and the fact I struggled with the way I learn. It wasn’t easy. Sometimes it’s still not.”
Gabriel started rocking.
“You’re not understanding, are you?”
He shook his head.
“Can you do me a favor and take in a few deep breaths? That always helps me relax.”
Gabriel did as Miles asked. The rocking slowed, but it didn’t go away.
Progress, that’s all Miles could ask for.
“You know how you sometimes process emotions differently than your sister. Or me?”
Gabriel nodded.
“Well, it’s like that for me with information. I struggle with reading. I’m dyslexic, among other things.”
“I’ve never heard of that before.”
“It’s a big word to describe someone who sees words on the page different from everyone else. It’s so bad for me, that it’s easier for me to listen to a book. Or to learn by doing something rather than have to try to read it. My mother always believed that in time, I’d simply overcome it.”
“Haven’t you?” Gabriel glanced up.
“Nope. Letters and numbers are still all jumbled on the page. It’s why I almost never deal with the money at the shop and why Trinity has to run the business side of things. It’s why I never became a cop like my brothers because I would have never been able to pass the entrance exam. Add that to something calledADD and what a psychologist would describe as generalized social anxiety, I was lucky to go to trade school and learn how to tinker with cars.”
“But you’re so good at doing that. The best. And you’re good with people.” Gabriel blinked his big blue eyes. “You’re so smart when it comes to all that.”
“I had some good teachers who understood that I didn’t process information the same way. But people. Not so much. I do well with one-on-one situations, but I hate crowds. Despise them,” Miles said. “Your sister totally gets you and how you deal with emotions. I get that she doesn’t always go about talking to you the right way, but cut her a little slack when it comes to Charlie. While she might not want him in her life and you need to respect that, she doesn’t want to hurt you in the process.”
“That does make sense.” Gabriel sighed. “I’m tired. Do you mind if I go to bed now?”
