Page 33 of The Warrior Priest
“You don’t have to justify yourself, Rhys.”
“Thanks.” He hefted the body higher, lifting the feet off the ground, before settling the weight again. He might not find the body heavy, but he was finding it awkward.
I set aside my repulsion and slipped the dead man’s other arm around my shoulders, helping Rhys carry him. We shared grim smiles over the top of the lolling head.
“The thing is,” Rhys went on, “the order got me through some very difficult times after my father died. I never knew my mother, so he was my entire world, and I was at that age when a boy becomes a man. He was good friends with Master Tomaj, so it was natural for him to take me in when I had no one else. I wasn’t the easiest youth.” He huffed a laugh. “I got drunk a lot. I was arrested more times than I can count. I did a lot of other things I should have been arrested for but was never caught. Master Tomaj persisted with me when everyone told him I was a lost cause. He was more patient with me than my own father would have been.” He adjusted the weight of the body again. “At some point, I joined the brothers in their training. It taught me discipline and restraint, and gave me a purpose, a reason to stop drinking and doing stupid things.”
“You don’t call this stupid?”
He laughed softly. “My purpose is noble this time.”
“Rhys, I understand why you joined the order.”
“But you don’t know why I stay, not when I see the same holes that you do or disagree with some of the rules.” When I didn’t respond, he continued. “I don’t think priests and priestesses should be celibate. Nor do I agree with the rigid hours of prayer. It should be done when the time feels right, not when a bell tolls. Sometimes, I used to question myself as to whether I’d done the right thing in joining. I’d ask myself should I stay or go? I decided to stay, and the reason why is always the same.”
I’d never realized he’d questioned his devotion to the order. By always avoiding discussions of religion for fear it would divide us, it had kept a very important part of Rhys from me. “Why?”
“Because I want to. I feel as though I’m in the right place.”
It was a response that provoked no counter-response. As someone who preferred to deal in facts, not unproven beliefs, I couldn’t argue with him. It was an indisputable fact that a person couldn’t decide to feel a particular way. They just did.
“Does that make sense?” he asked.
“It does. I understand now.”
If he noticed my voice sounded strained as I held back my tears, he didn’t say anything. The small spark of hope I’d held that he would one day leave the order for me, despite what he’d said after the kiss, extinguished. My heart shattered. It wasn’t until that moment that I even realized I’d held some hope that he’d change his mind, that the feelings we both felt were strong enough to convince him to leave the order to be with me.
Without hope…what was left?
I plodded on, the body getting heavier with every step. It was a relief when Rhys announced we’d arrived.
I blinked, looking around. “The deputy governor’s house is down there.”
“We’re not going that way. I’m going to wait here while you go around the back and pick off a piece of the vine that grows up to the balcony. Make sure to include leaves or flowers, something that easily identifies it as having come from that particular vine.”
I shucked off my cloak but didn’t want to place it around the smelly clothing on the corpse, so I folded it up and placed it near Rhys’s feet. I left him and raced around to the rear of the properties, following the same route I’d used when I followed Giselle on the night of the murder. It was darker tonight, the moon offering very little light to help me find my way. The leaves from a low-hanging branch struck me across the face, stinging my cheek, and I stepped in a large puddle that hadn’t been there last time.
The poor light meant I didn’t feel so exposed as I raced across the lawn and twisted off a section of the vine. I made sure to include some russet-colored leaves and a small berry that had shriveled in the cold. In a strong wind, both would fall off, so I was careful to protect them as I returned to Rhys.
I tucked the vine, leaves and berry into the corpse’s boot, twisting one end around the boot laces so that it wouldn’t easily fall out. Now all we had to do was take the body to the river. Going by the smell on the clothes, it had to be returned to the industrial part of the city. In the morning, a worker would find it and alert the constables. Hopefully they were smart enough to check it thoroughly and find the evidence we’d planted.
It was a long walk from the exclusive residential area where the deputy governor had lived. We’d only traveled a few streets when Rhys offered to take the full weight of the body. I hesitated before slipping free. “I saw a barrow earlier. We can put him in that.” I handed Rhys my cloak, which I still hadn’t put back on, then retreated the way we’d come.
I turned the corner just as a carriage passed, its lamps swinging, providing enough light for me to see the governor’s escutcheon on the door.
“Merdu,” I muttered as I crouched behind a bush.
But it was too late. I’d been seen. The occupant of the carriage ordered the driver to stop.
As it slowed, two guards jumped off the footboards and ran toward me.
“Come out!” The shout wasn’t from the guards. It came from my uncle as he stepped down from the carriage.
Without my cloak, I had no hood to cover my fair hair. The color was common among Glancians, so I doubted Uncle Roderic could be certain it was me, and the light was too poor for him to have seen my face properly. “Show yourself!” he demanded as he hurried after his men.
Crouching where I was, I was a sitting duck. I sprang up and ran. I had a head start, and was quick, but it wouldn’t be long before I tired. Stamina wasn’t one of my strengths.
I took a circuitous route, intending to find somewhere to hide, only to realize I was back where I started. Rhys stood with the corpse in the shadows of a large tree on the side of the street.
