Page 127 of The Nightmare Bride
I swallowed the stone in my throat. “No. I already told you. I’ve been telling you this whole time. That isn’t how this works.”
His face hardened. His eyes chilled, but he straightened, tugging at his ruined coat. “So that’s it, then? You’re absolutely certain?”
“Yes.”
“Well.” He sniffed. “Even I can tell when I’m not wanted.”
A steely weight descended on my shoulders. Goddess, I couldn’t manage another word. If I tried, I would break.
He leaned in and kissed my temple. Tears invaded my throat, but I walled them off.
“Goodbye, then, just Harlowe,” he murmured.
“Goodbye, just Kai.”
He scanned the great hall, then nodded at those assembled. “It’s been a pleasure.”
Nobody said anything. After a moment, Ky turned and walked into the glowing morning. For the second time in my life, I watched a white-clad back fade into the distance.
I stood there until the beacon of his jacket winked out.
I didn’t cry. I closed the front doors, then trudged past Merron, who shook his head at me, then the stewards. Past an oddly silent Olivian. Then up past Amryssa, who stood on the stairs, a vision in white lace, a glinting, priceless jewel in this tarnished crown. She reached for my arm, but I shrugged her off.
Only once I reached the safety of my room did I allow myself to cry.
And then, it was so much more than crying. It was me completely falling apart.
31.
Aweek passed. And another.
With Kai and Vick gone, an uneasy peace descended on the house, and I threw myself into caring for Amryssa. She continued to shed weight at an alarming pace, each day solidifying my conviction that she couldn’t stay here. Especially because I’d lost the dagger, and now had no way to protect her from the nightmares.
I had a month, probably less, to get her out.
I begged Olivian to let me take her to Hightower, royal marriage be damned. But ever since I’d publicly rebuked him in the great hall, he mostly communicated in grunts and sneers.
“She’s not going anywhere,” he growled, when I finally pestered him into answering. “I won’t just send her out into the world with no guarantee. It’ll chew her up and spit her out. She’s too soft. Too fragile.”
Tears pricked at my eyes. “But that’s my point. Sheisfragile. So fragile she’s wasting away. She can’t stay here.”
Olivian’s reddened eyes did their best to scorch a hole in me. “This is the safest place for her, now.” His insistence carrieda hint of the same madness I’d heard that night in the Lady’s room, and I knew, then—he would never let her go. Maybe he never would have.
So I decided to steal her.
Over the next week, I squirreled away every bite of food I could lay hands on. I stashed rye bread and hard cheese, dried jerky and berries. I also “borrowed” two waterskins from Miss Quist, though I didn’t tell her what they were for. I figured she probably knew, and since she gave them to me anyway, that equated to approval, in my mind.
As the days passed, the heat of summer broke, the heavy humidity giving way to afternoon rainshowers that peppered the windows. Each time the clouds cleared, the honeyed sunset arrived a few minutes earlier.
In another week, I’d have enough supplies to last us. Then we would disappear.
Multiple times, I wondered where Kai was. At first, I’d mentally tracked his progress along the Oceansgate road, but by now, he would’ve made it back to civilization, maybe even to Fairmont. Or maybe he’d changed his mind and gone somewhere else entirely.
I hoped not, though. Some part of me liked believing he’d accomplished his goal, that I’d gifted him with that last experience he’d wanted so badly.
Still, that didn’t keep me from missing him. Horribly. Every reminder of him—the clothes he’d left hanging in my armoire, the dried peonies I’d now enshrined in a vase on my nightstand—added footprint upon footprint to the trail of pain stretching behind me, which seemed to lengthen with each passing day.
Not that I doubted whether I’d done the right thing. Kai had nearly died, and I’d protected both of us by sending him away. There wasn’t any way I could have joined him. Even if I’d donethe impossible and left Amryssa, things would’ve eventually fallen apart.
