Page 62 of A Dance With Fire
She took a breath and blurted, “I have to take a piss.”
Ryker’s eyebrows rose, and it wasn’t in amusement.
“You’re my bodyguard, aren’t you? Guard my body,” she teased. She wasn’t sure what was wrong with her. It was the wine. The bubbly effect of it had migrated to her brain and she couldn’t think clearly. Her hands reached up and stroked along the strands of his beard, and just as soon as she realized what she was doing, she yanked her hand away. “Don’t bite my arm off,” she pleaded breathlessly.
His thick brows pulled together. “Why… would I do that?”
“For touching you.”
They both kept quiet, and she was a bit amazed that he still hadn’t roughly shoved her away from him.
“You hate me,” she observed.
Shut up, shut up, shut up!She willed her mind, but it wasn’t listening. Words just kept pouring out of her.
“Is it because of my ears?”
His lips pressed together in a thin line, and he tried to look away, but she reached her palms up and brought his gaze back to hers.
“Listen here, asshole.” The anger suddenly rose. She hated the way he looked at her, the way he judged her for what she had to do to survive. “We were staying in the reservations. I don’t know if you’re familiar with the rules, but they only allowed magicless Fae. Anyone caught with magic was taken. The emperor’s soldiers took my parents because ofme. Because of this stupid fucking magic inside. I let it loose, and it destroyed everyone there. I watched them take my parents away into the camp…” Shula broke off. Ryker tried to look away, but she forced his gaze on hers, keeping his face pressed tightly between her hands. “I ran. I had no idea where to go. Then this old human lady found me and hid me in her attic.”
Shula remembered vividly what she looked like. The pearls around her neck. The kind eyes and graying hair. Just as vividly as she remembered the floors stained crimson with her blood.
“She took me to a surgeon. Said she would keep me and protect me, but I had to look normal to survive. I was just a kid and I trusted her, so I let them change my ears. But then a day later she fucking died.”
“Shula…” Clay’s voice sounded behind, past the music, past her own pounding heart, but she ignored it. She focused on Ryker and the hatred in his eyes that she was tired of feeling keenly around her.
“Soldiers found us. Again. They murdered her in front of me.” Tears prickled behind her eyelids, and she tried to blink them away, but they slid down her temples. “I tried to stop them, but they came after me, and I burned them with my fire.” She still remembered their expressions of panic as the fire spread against their arms. “I took her jewelry and ran straight to the circus. The only place where they wouldn’t find me, because that’s where all the freaks live. So think aboutthatnext time you look at me with those judgmental fucking eyes of yours, you big bastard.”
Shula let go of his face and slid from his lap, falling into the dust. She forced herself to her feet, brushing herself off with her palms. She turned and found Julius and Clay staring at her. Ignoring the pity in their eyes, she stormed away, hating herself for everything the wine made her confess.
Maybe she’d hoped that by talking about it, she’d feel some type of closure, maybe become closer to someone, anyone.
Yet Ryker had still looked at her like she was scum of the earth.
The worst part about it was, he was probably right.
* * *
“Fuck.”Clay raked a hand through his hair as he stared after Shula.
Julius echoed the sentiment. “Fuck.”
“I’ll go talk to her.” Clay started forward, but Ryker felt his legs pushing up until he was standing.
“No,” he stated, cutting Clay off mid-step.
He couldn’t explain it. He didn’t feel particularly closer to her after that confession. He didn’t even fucking like her any more than he had before. All he knew was that it was a confession meant for him and no one else. She’d been trying to prove a point. That she wasn’t a coward? That she was Fae, too? Ryker wasn’t sure, and he didn’t give a fuck.
The story had been meant for him and so he would go after her and drag her back.
Ignoring Clay’s gaping mouth and Julius’ annoying smirk, he stepped past the revelers and followed the Fire Dancer’s stumbling footsteps into the woods.
She was quite loud in her drunkenness, so he followed. She wandered deep into the woods and when she stopped, he tilted his head to the side. The sudden trickle of dripping reached his ears along with the smell of urine.
His eyes rolled.
She reallyhadneeded to take a piss. He’d assumed she was making up more excuses to try and escape.
