Page 154 of Lourdes & the Mafia
It’s right then that my mind goes back, rushing to a particular moment.
“What does this one do?” Lourdes asks, pointing at a glass case and the thin jewelry inside.
“It gives the illusion of death to the wearer,” I reply almost absently. “But this is my favorite piece in our collection.” I guide her away from it, uninterested in the contents inside in favor of something else.
“No…” I swallow past the lump in my throat, too afraid to hope, too afraid to even fucking feel. My fingers tremble as they slowly find the clasp on the bracelet. I bite my bottom lip and hear the steady click as I release it and pull the delicate chain away…
Waiting.
Hoping.
Wanting.
But her body is still.
Unmovable.
Dead.
A sob lodges itself in my chest and I choke it down, pulling away from Lourdes entirely. Giving in to the impulses of my rage, I fling the relic across the cavern, letting a nearby pit of fire consume it. The flames stutter and flicker before they settle. Only then do I pick up the sponge to resume what I was doing. This time, though, as I swipe the sponge across her hand, Lourdes’s fingers twitch.
I freeze, looking up at her face in time to see her eyelids flutter…
…and Lourdes takes a deep breath of life.
Kane
MountVitaisconstantlyguarded by sentinels, by vicious demons on the outside, blocking any wayward soul or creature from entering or attempting to throw themselves into the fires.
No one is allowed inside.
No one except for us.
I’ve never been inside the dug-out passages of the volcano. Never been inside the cavern that takes souls into new life. I’ve never had reason to be here.
Until now.
The heat pulsing off the wet stone is oppressive. More oppressive than fire from The Pit could ever be. Because in here, I know what is coming.
I know that, in here, will be the last moments we ever get with Lourdes again.
But I don’t know if I can. I don’t know if I can go in there and say goodbye without falling to my knees. I don’t think I can watch Ramiel send her off into the fire without diving into the flames after her. Because with her gone, that sliver of sunlight that burst into my life unbidden disappears too.
I have nothing left without her here.
Nothing but what I’ve always been. All anger and torture and sentiments bottled inside.
And I don’t want to be that demon anymore.
She made me this way. She changed me.
She taught me what it is to love.
And I’m the fucking fool who never said it back to her when I had the chance. She went to the fucking grave never knowing.
I feel the sharpness of my magic threatening to consume me. A fresh wave of grief hits, nearly making me buckle. I have to press my shoulder against the wall in order to keep from crumpling.
A strangled sound tears out of me. Like a dying fucking animal. I try to hold it back, I try to keep myself in check, but sadness is a fucking beast, devouring, consuming, brutal in its consumption. Sometimes it feels inevitable, like a river rising to drown the very life out of you and all you want to give in to the push and pull and go under.
