‘She doesn’t go anywhere without one of us,’ Nic says quietly when the others settle down. ‘Not ever. That starts now.’
Haz nods. ‘Done.’
‘Right.’ She goes back into the kitchen, dropping her empty tumbler into the sink. ‘Let’s head out then.’
‘Really?’ I stay stuck to the sofa. ‘You say all that and we’re just going to go out? I don’t even know what he looks like.’
‘You’ll be fine for tonight. He’ll still be licking his wounds after his round with Blakely.’
‘We should hire her,’ Haz says. ‘She’d make a mint bodyguard.’
‘Absolutely fucking not,’ I reply. ‘I don’t need a bodyguard. Like you said, I’m never alone much.’
‘Make that never.’ Nic picks up her jacket from the armchair and shrugs it on. ‘Now let’s fucking go.’
There’s something comforting about being at the centre of a mass of dancing bodies. Safety in numbers, the heat of them all strangely sedative. So many witnesses if something was to happen. Even Haz and Elly have relaxed. They’ve let me pee alone all night.
I made myself stop at three drinks. I’m just past tipsy but still completely with it. Nic seems to be pacing herself the same. I’ve not seen her with a drink that isn’t water for a while. Then again, she’s probably been snorting shit all night.
Vipers is more packed than usual. Everything’s deceptively quiet outside but the storm’s due to land soon. Lockdown starts at five, just after Friday afternoon lectures. This feels like one final foray before it all goes down.
I’m kind of relieved. A whole weekend of nothing means time to digest everything. This stuff with Nic and Damien, and now somehow me. Always tied, me and her. God, everything makes so much sense now. Her odd, peppered comments. The way she always looked at me. Halloween hadn’t been our first meeting after all. That look of rage seems even more haunting now.
Haz left me with Elly a while ago, but I seem to have lost her too. I push my way off the dance floor, quickly spotting her against the wall, empty glass in hand.
‘Hey. Thought you’d done a runner like New Year’s Eve.’
Elly rolls her eyes. ‘I was chucking up in the forest, I told you.’
‘The forest as opposed to all the lodge toilets. I’ve even seen you vom in the bath.’
‘Aw, babe. I was so fucked that night. I was trying to see the moon. I wanted to show you it.’
‘You are too cute, Elly-Belly.’
I lean up and kiss her, balancing on her biceps. She kisses me back for only a moment before ducking her head.
‘Hey.’ I stroke hair back from her forehead. ‘Are you okay? You seem a bit off tonight.’
‘Yeah, just… Tilds, why didn’t you tell me you and Nic knew each other before?’
‘What?’
Elly shakes her head beseechingly. ‘Please don’t deny it.’
‘I’m not denying it. Was it Haz who told you?’
She shrugs, a sad smile on her lips. ‘Just thought we were more than that. That’s a pretty big deal, Tilda. And then all this stuff with Damien I didn’t know either.’
‘Elly. We are more than that. We’re the fucking most.’ I tip my head back, feeling like I might cry. ‘I just hadn’t got round to telling you yet. It…it still feels surreal, saying it out loud. Like it’s not happening. Like I’m crazy or something. Elly, I didn’t mean to upset you. Please. I’d never want to do that. I didn’t choose to tell Haz and not you. It just kind of happened.’
I want to roll my eyes at how trite that sounds.
Elly nods, still with that heartbreaking smile on her face. ‘No foul, babe. Just sucks being the last to know everything.’
‘I’ll tell you everything, I promise. Tomorrow, yeah?’
‘Yeah.’ She deposits a quick kiss on my cheek. ‘Sure. I’m gonna go and get another drink. Go find Haz, yeah?’