Page 17 of Claiming His Lost Duchess
She'd just about had enough of this ridiculous charade. She wouldn't want to marry this ridiculous excuse of a man, even if he was the very last breathing man on earth —
“I heard you are a widow. My condolences. Might I ask how your husband died? Was it from neglect, perhaps? Poison? A knife wound?”
Joan nearly spat out her wine.
“I beg your pardon?”
“I mean — the fault is likely yours for settling for someone from those parts, despite your high birth. This is why women cannot be trusted to handle their affairs. Your kind is quick to err, to ruin not just their lives but also those of their families. It would have been better if you had allowed your uncle to secure you a match or if you had stayed in London to be courted properly. Who knows if that marriage is truly blessed by the Lord?”
Joan wanted to laugh at how passionate he was about scolding her over a husband who did not exist. She had long since lost her appetite, but pushing food around her plate gave her hands something to do while the Baron went on and on.
She was glad to know that her instincts had not been wrong about this silly man and had kept her expectations low for this evening. What had disappointed her more than anything else had been Georgina's steady agreement with the man, her eyes shining eagerly as though she patiently awaited his approval.
It did not come as a surprise that Georgina was not as alarmed as Joan was by all that she had heard, given that it seemed they were on different sides from the start. Still, it was startling how willing her cousin was to stand by while she was made into a laughing stock by a man who Joan could bet had poor luck in finding a wife thus far.
“It doesn't matter now, Lord Highcastle. Her husband has passed, and she is ready to start a new life here, with the right man,” Georgina assured the Baron.
The balding nuisance snorted, dabbing a napkin to the corner of his lips before he spat,
“It is hardly a new life when she bears burdens from the one before. It is already a shame that she is saddled with that mistake of a child from her late husband, as she will remain a stain on whatever new path you try to make.”
Joan refused to believe she had heard that correctly. First, she looked to Georgina, and when her cousin deliberately refused to meet her eyes, she knew she had not imagined the despicable nonsense this vile man had spat.
And now, she was done tolerating him.
“How hypocritical of you, Lord Highcastle. You seem rather pleased to note out other people's faults and flaws, yet you do not realize that you are quite poorly behaved yourself. You grace the home of another, and all you have are complaints and cruel remarks about their relative? And you believe that what — yourtitle gives you the right to act so rudely? I am quite disappointed. Even my daughter, as young as she is, knows better than to be a nuisance in someone else's home,” Joan snapped, rising to her feet.
Highcastle sputtered angrily, clearly shocked and appalled that someone would have the gall to speak to him that way.
“How dare you raise your voice at me? I did not permit you to speak — much less in such a disgraceful manner! No wonder you are struggling to find a husband. Any man with half a brain would know better than to even so much as be betrothed to you,” he shouted, wagging a finger at her.
Georgina tried to apologize, but once the Baron had said his piece, he turned around and left the dining hall. Joan watched her cousin scurry after him, exhaling deeply once she was left alone with her thoughts.
Men had always been difficult creatures to relate to for her. And it seemed that things still hadn’t changed on that front.
Suddenly, she recalled the man with auburn hair who made her laugh, who treated her as though she were a porcelain doll, whose touch burned and comforted her at once. She had tried to forget him, tried not to think about him, especially now that he was so close and could take away the only person Joan lived for, but she couldn't help but… miss him.
A silly emotion that wasn’t meant to be given to someone she did not know.
“Do you have any idea what you’ve done?” Georgina asked in outrage as she returned to the room.
“I assume you’ll tell me,” Joan grumbled tiredly. “Just as you joined him to tell me how I should have lived my life all evening.”
“That was only some friendly advice! And he did have a good point. If you hadn't been so… careless, you wouldn't have gone ahead to be saddled with something as important as a child. You have done your best caring for her until now, but you can only do so much by yourself, the older she gets. You need help, and you have insulted the one person who was interested in offering his assistance without looking too closely at your past.” Georgina said with an exasperated sigh.
“He was practically interrogating me during our meal! And you think he wasn’t trying to pry? I do not like him. Such a man shouldn’t be near other people, much less other children. What sort of will I be setting to Sophia if I let such a man into her life?” Joan fumed, suddenly feeling even worse.
Moments later, she might've thrown her half-full glass of wine in that man's face.
“You are worrying too much, and about the wrong things. I do not know why you are so against getting married, but you do not have a lot of time. In the eyes of theton, you are a widow with a child. Any man who might want your hand in marriage would have to consider whether or not they wouldn't mind your daughter accompanying you into the marriage. If you want to stay together, then you need a man who will be merciful enoughto let that happen. You cannot afford to be picky, Joan. You cannot afford much, really. So think long and hard about what your priorities are and make up your mind to do the right thing for your daughter and yourself.”
Joan tried to protest, but Georgina shook her head quickly.
“What happened tonight cannot repeat itself. Lord Highcastle is an important member of theton,and we need to be in his good graces, no matter what. If you had your emotions under control, you wouldn't have reacted so strongly to his remarks. And you must make it up to him. He will be present at a ball we are to attend in a few days, and you will apologize to him then. Do you understand?”
Joan did not want to. Apologizing meant letting him believe he was right, and she abhorred such an idea with everything in her.
But Georgina was leaving no room for negotiation or complaints. With how much her cousin was doing to support her, Joan did not want to cross her or seem ungrateful.
