Page 8 of Claiming His Lost Duchess
The air around them grew awkward quickly, and the discomfort it brought wasted no time getting underneath Joan's skin.
“Not that I am not thrilled to see you, dear cousin, but I have to admit that I am quite surprised. I never expected to see you here, especially without any word beforehand. What brings youto my humble home?” Joan spoke up eventually, hoping to hurry things along.
Georgina seemed momentarily distracted by her curious glances around the foyer, but when she eventually looked at Joan, the latter could see the distress hidden behind her eyes.
“Father is dead.”
Joan felt her heart still for a moment, and she tried to comprehend what Georgina was telling her.
Benedict was… dead? When? How?
“What do you mean —”
“He took a trip to France a few weeks ago, and he was in an accident. I received word about an accident. Father did not survive.”
It was as though the world around Joan was threatening to spin out of control. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing.
For all her hatred for her uncle, she had never imagined that what would sever any connection between them would be his death. She waited for relief to come, but all she felt was her breath leaving her lungs and struggling to come back in.
“So… why have you come to see me? You could have sent this message through the post,” Joan reasoned, still confused by Georgina’s presence.
Georgina sighed, as though she thought she would not have to explain herself.
“Since Father is gone now, I thought you might want to return to London and start your life anew. I understand… that you had to leave because you did not feel comfortable being around him. Us. But I was hoping that you would put that behind you now and come home.”
Joan took a defensive step back as she shook her head.
“I-I do not think so. I like my life here. Things are simple and quiet, and I appreciate what I have managed to achieve here, away from all the noise and prying eyes in London. I have already had to start anew once. Twice is not an appealing idea, honestly,” she explained, wrapping her arms around herself as she walked towards a window.
Georgina huffed, her tone strained as she emphasized, “It would not be exactly like starting over the way you did here. You are familiar with London and the way of life — and you know things are better there. You'll have better work opportunities there, and you'll have a bigger, better home. Not to mention, it is an ideal place for the growth of a child. Think about doing what's right for you and your daughter, Joan. Please.”
At the mention of her daughter, Joan peered through the window into the garden, a smile crawling up her lips as she spotted her daughter seated on the grass as she played with a doll that Joan had saved up to buy for her. The very sight of her made Joan's heart swell with pride as she took in everything that made her little girl so special and lovely, from her fair skin, her small hands that always reached for Joan's whenever she was close, her blue eyes that always shone with curiosity, and her auburn hair.
Joan loved her daughter with everything she had, and she wanted the very best for her. Perhaps she ought to consider this idea a little more thoroughly.
“I wouldn’t want to burden you, Georgina. You should be living your life for yourself, not stuck taking care of me and my child,” she expressed after a few minutes.
“Do not think of it that way. You can merely stay with me for the time being, until you can sustain yourself. And you could use the opportunity to find a husband as well! You are still quite beautiful, despite all the time you've spent in these parts. Surely there are a few men who would be interested in taking you as a wife,” Georgina suggested, grinning as it seemed that Joan was buying into the idea.
However, Joan was quick to refuse her suggestion.
“I have no interest in looking for a husband, Georgina. I am fine with the way my life is — just my daughter and me. That is all I need. I will only be going to London because there are moreyoung ladies there whom I can help with my teachings. Nothing more. I will not be taking a husband,” Joan said firmly.
“Do not be silly, Joan. You need a husband! You cannot afford to bring your daughter up properly if you do not have the money or influence to introduce her into the proper circles. That might have sufficed on these parts if you wished to continue with the subpar life you have lived till now. But you do want Sophia to have a good upbringing and good prospects when she is of age, do you not? Then it is important to give her a good education and a good family. Men will not take her seriously if they hear she was raised by her mother alone. If you worry about what men might think about you having your daughter out of wedlock, no one has to know. We can say that her father passed away, and you are a widow, nothing more. Thetonwill not know a single thing,” Georgina assured her.
Joan still felt reluctant to wholly accept the idea, but she knew better than to argue with Georgina, who would go to whatever lengths she could to get what she wanted. Still, she did not want to give the impression she was willing to bend the principles she had lived by so easily, based on a suggestion.
“Sophia deserves to live as good a life as possible. And I have worked hard to provide for her as best as I can. I do not know if I feel as though I like the thought of relying on someone to care for her the way I do – especially someone who was not directly involved in her conception. But… I will consider it,” Joan said slowly.
Georgina looked as though she wanted to press more on the former matter, but inevitably chose to swallow her disapproval, focusing instead on what was certain.
“So, you’ll do it? You’ll move back to London?”
Truth be told, Joan did not have much to lose, other than the peace of being out of reach from the ton. And so, for the sake of her daughter’s future, she would do everything she could.
“Yes. I will.”
After dinner that evening, Joan decided to use her daughter’s bath time to broach the subject of moving.
