Page 57 of Don't Leave
Even though it’s tempting to look away from his probing gaze, I don’t.
“Yes,” I say with a nod. “He told me that he feels more than friendship for me.”
Cole snorts before shaking his head in disgust. “He knew we were together when he told you that.”
“Yes.”
A heavy silence falls over us before he asks in a clipped tone, “Is he trying to steal you from me or is his plan to undermine our relationship and wait it out?”
My brows pinch together. “Does it matter? What we have has nothing to do with Luke. It shouldn’t matter what he wants. You just need to trust me.”
He plows his fingers through his damp hair. “Jeez, Cassidy. You have to realize it’s not that easy. Even though Luke is my teammate, he’s more than willing to screw me over to have you. How am I supposed to trust him both on and off the ice?” He doesn’t give me time to answer. “I can’t do it.” Exhaustion fills every line of his face before he adds, “And it doesn’t feel like I can trust you to tell me the truth either. You could have told me that you two were together at the library and you chose not to.”
My heart flutters painfully before beating into overtime. “I didn’t want to upset you,” I whisper.
But it sounds bad.
Even to my own ears.
I made the wrong choice and should have been upfront with Cole.
And now it looks like I might lose him because of it.
The corners of his lips tug downward. He looks as miserable as I feel.
“If Luke hadn’t come out of the library with your notebook, you wouldn’t have told me that you two spent any time together.” The pause that follows has my muscles tensing. “And that’s what bothers me most. I have no idea if this is the firsttime it’s happened or if you’ve chosen to hide it from me because there’s actually something going on between you two.”
A hot rush of tears sting my eyes. “Nothing is going on between us. I wouldnevercheat on you.”
“Yeah, well, unfortunately someone else I trusted said those very words to me and I’m not about to let it happen again.” His gaze drops to his fingers. “I think Luke saving you that night has messed with your head and you either feel beholden to him or you’ve actually developed feelings that run deeper than friendship.” He pauses as his hollowed-out eyes cut back to mine. “You need to figure that out without me getting in the way.”
When I shake my head, ready to argue with him, he jerks to his feet. I have no other choice but to do the same. Even though I’m loath to put myself out there, I take a tentative step toward him, only wanting to bridge the distance between us. What I really want to do is hurtle myself into his arms and feel them band around me, holding me tight.
“I love you. You have to know that you’re the only one I want to be with.”
As the words leave my lips, I know they’re the truth.
I feel them deep in my heart.
The fact that Cole feels like he can’t trust me, rips me apart inside. I can’t help but wonder if maybe, without realizing it, I’ve sent Luke the wrong message. Did I let him think there would be, at some point, an opportunity for us to be more than just friends?
I don’t know.
“Cole, please…” I have no idea what I’m begging for.
Forgiveness?
A second chance to prove that he’s the one I love?
The way he shakes his head makes my heart clench painfully.
“I think we both need to take a little bit of time to figure things out. What happened on the ice tonight…” his voice trails off as he glances away. Dull color stains his cheeks. “I can’t allow that to happen again. That’s not the kind of player I am.” He amends softly, “It’s not the kind of person I am.”
“I know that,” I whisper.
I know exactly who Cole Mathews is.
It kills me to think that I’ve caused this to unfold between us.
