Page 106 of Nemesync
We made dinner that night, and it was strange to have her so close to me and this intimate. We ate, and she was just smiling and giggling. We talked for hours about her love for books and music. We talked about my boxing habits too.
Boxing is my remedy when the pain is unbearable. It’s a way to hide psychological scars beneath physical wounds. It might be unhealthy, but why start giving a fuck now?
Never cared about what’s good for me.
Not a word was said about how she felt after what happened yesterday. Every time I tried to bring it up, she would just shut down the conversation and change the subject. If she didn’t want to talk about it, I wouldn’t force her
I opened my balcony, took two wine glasses, and offered her one.
Zanae was already there, lost again in her head. She was looking past the window to the sky; the stars and the night were the place she lost herself in. So, I let her feel it, immersed in her thoughts, and I just observed her, loving the way her eyes were fixed to a distant point, the way her hair fell around her face, and the way her lips smiled.
Then she rubbed her nape again and turned, finding me bewitched by her.
She was lost in the sky, and I was lost in her.
Tonight, the sky was full of stars and beautiful, just like the ones my mother loved so much when she was alive. I draped a plaid over those delicate shoulders, my fingers lingering for a moment longer than necessary.
“I’ve always loved the night sky,” she whispered, her voice carrying a sweet melody of sadness that spoke to me more than it should have. “There’s something intriguing about the stars. It’s like a whole other world, full of secrets. Maybe in this one, things would be different.”
I studied her intently, and asked, “Secrets?”
She nodded; her gaze fixed on that deep blue sky, “Each star has its secrets, Elijah. They’ve witnessed history silently. They saw highs and lows of humanity, an infinite amount of love stories, wars, griefs, death and life. It’s comforting, knowing that no matter how chaotic life gets around me, the stars remain constant. They were here before me and will still be here after.”
I listened attentively, drawn not only to her words but also to the way she spoke, the way her eyes were glowing, the way her voice turned like a murmur, as if she was speaking to herself, in her own head, reminding her own mind that the stars could be an escape.
An escape for her soul. Shattered and painful.
“You find comfort in them,Milaya?”
She chuckled softly, “I do. Life can be so chaotic, but the night sky makes me feel like there’s always someone with me, you know?”
Maybe that’s what my mother saw in them too. That comfort, endless infinity, she knew that no matter what, the only thing that she’ll always see and find is the sky.
I leaned against the balcony railing, captivated by her perspective on everything.
“They don’t know how lucky they are.”
Because they’re loved by you.
She turned her gaze to me, a playful glint in those beautiful eyes. “You’re like the sky too in a way. The stars in you started shining long before it became even darker in your head. So, when I look through you, I still see them glittering. maybe that’s why I’m so drawn to you.”
She wasn’t flirting with me.
She was studying me, and still found a way to analyze me gently. She was just being honest, without understanding how clever and talented she was with words.
“You’ve got a talent hereZvyozdochka,” I mused, my eyes locking onto hers. “It’s both infuriating and fascinating.”
She wasn’t aware of how luminous she was.
“What does it mean?” She asked, smiling curiously.
I kissed the tip of her fingers, enjoying everything about what she brought me, even the violence, hurt and hatred, I found peace in them. “It means Little Star.”
“Teach me how to say it so I could call you like that.”
I raised an eyebrow, a small smirk betraying my amusement. “Are you comparing me to stars because they’re old? I’m only eight years older.”
She let out a fake outraged scream. “Oh my god, I just slept with an old man. Does that mean you’re a DILF?”
