Page 294 of Nemesync
He nodded and kissed me before whispering, “I trust you.”
I headed out, the destination clear in my mind.
It was silent in the cemetery, and here I found myself standing before this grave again, a flood of emotions engulfing me.
So much has changed.
I took a deep breath, as if calling out for her soul. “Luna…I miss you so much.” I continued, “I’m with Elijah now. I love him. I think you would love him too.” I let out a nervous laugh.
Was it okay to still feel her even if she was not here anymore?
“Niko too, he’s like the annoying brother I never had—always there, always ready with a hug or a joke. You’d love to tease him. He’s a lot like you, maybe that’s why I loved him from the start so easily.”
I paused, looking down at the flowers adorning her resting place.Lilies, always lilies. “Miranda’s doing well. June turned four not so long ago, he’s the cutest, and he remembers you, asking me about you. He calls youMoon…” I smiled, “and I have a new friend, Brian. She’s like that skilled hacker who’s digging into things people want to hide. A true genius.”
Remembering the last few weeks was painful, but I needed her to know everything.
“Elias tried to kill me; my mother shot me. I even almost killed myself. I almost followed you.” A tear fell on the cold grass. “I understand you now, and I’m not even angry at you. I hope you’re seeing me from your little angel home or whatever from the sky, and that you’re damn proud of me. Because I survived…”
The heaviness in my heart felt suffocating as I turned around, startled by the sound of someone approaching.
It was Niko greeting me with a smile. “Fancy meeting you here again. Remember the first time we had a heart-to-heart right at this exact same spot, Little Z?”
“She’ll forever be dead…” I whispered to him and without hesitation, I found myself in his arms, letting out a few quiet sobs on his chest.
“Shh, it’s alright. I’m here, I’m here, Princess,” softly he added, “We’re all here for you. Family protects family,” he declared, and in that moment, I felt a warmth I hadn’t experienced in a long time.
I stepped back, maintaining my arm around him, and gazed at the grave on the ground. “I came close to not making it, Niko. I nearly found myself there too.”
His eyes met mine as he reached for my arm, giving little strokes, and he spoke with conviction, “Zanae, we would never have allowed you to leave. You must grasp that; you’re one of us, and that bond is fucking eternal.”
I smiled but couldn’t take my eyes off her name.
“You know, Elijah is probably rehearsing his ‘I’m her protective psycho’ speech right now. He might set a new record for how fast he can get here once he learns you gave me a hug,” Niko grinned, trying to make me feel better.
I chuckled, he was probably right.
After a beat, my expression softened, and I admitted, “Luna was so much more than what happened to her. She had this vibrant soul, and she was my friend.”
“I’m sure she was amazing. And you’re right, Zanae, her soul lives on. In your heart, your love for her.” He looked down at me with so much affection, “Stop feeling guilty, you deserve peace.”
Peace?
Peace was long gone, buried under the ruins of my sanity, beneath the rubble of war in my mind. I had to dig it out, bruising my hands in the process, scars on my wrists leaving blood on those heavy stones.
The pain was visceral. But again, it was life.
“I want to, but it’s painful.”
“Allow your pain some time,” he suggested.
“How long, Niko?”
Planting a soft kiss on my forehead, he murmured, “Until your heart heals, Little Z.”
My heart needed to understand that, even if shadows were still whispering memories of what once was, even if that haunting melody singing‘goodbye’was still playing on the strings of my soul, time will gently stitch our pain.
I kneeled on the ground, facing her grave, and whispered, “As long as the ocean is filled with water, and as long as the sky is filled with stars, Luna.”
