Page 27 of One Summer Weekend
‘And soon you’ll be settling down with Jack, by the sound of it,’ she put in.
‘Oh, I don’t know about that.’ Maybe I sounded too horrified, because she turned her head and gave me a penetratinglook. ‘It’s early days,’ I added, lamely.
‘Not necessarily. I can tell he’s serious.’
Huh, more like a bloody good actor!
She continued, ‘You make a great couple. I haven’t seen him like this for years – so at ease with himself.’
Oh, please. At this rate she’ll have us engaged before the weekend’s over …
‘It’s probably the merger with Sphinx,’ I said, quickly. ‘BeingChief Exec of a bigger company seems to motivate him.’
‘Alicia, believe me, it’s nothing to do with work – he’s always been good at keeping his personal life separate. This weekend, with you, he seems … happy.’ The implication was that this was something unusual.
‘Wasn’t he happy with Karina?’ The question was out before I could determine the pros and cons of hearing the reply.
A pause. ‘What’s he told you about her?’
‘Nothing specific – but I’ve seen the impact she still has on him. She came over to us at Corleone’s on Thursday night, and – and he took her home.’ That much was accurate, as was the disapproval in my voice.
‘Was she drunk?’
‘A little, I suppose.’
‘Well then, there’s your answer.’
But it wasn’t quite the answer I wanted.And I couldn’t pursue it any further because Jack came up behind us and said, ‘My turn now, Midge. In any case, your husband needs you for moral support – I’ve just been giving him an earbashing about Lauren.’
‘Och, just when we were getting to the interesting bits about you.’ A stage whisper in my direction – ‘See what I mean? He just can’t stay away!’ – before she drew to one side of thelane to wait for Bill.
Jack grabbed my hand and stepped up the pace. When we were at a safe distance from the others, he said, ‘I thought you needed rescuing.’
‘Thanks, but I didn’t. Who’s Lauren?’
‘Their daughter. She’s at university, but Bill’s still very protective.’ A pause. ‘Don’t you want to know the real reason for interrupting your conversation with Midge?’
‘No,although I have a feeling you’re going to tell me all the same.’
‘I couldn’t handle the view for much longer.’
I frowned. ‘The view?’
‘You in those trousers.’
A sidelong glance, in case he was joking; but his expression was enigmatic. When I tried to wrench my hand away, he held it tight – and I didn’t want to make a scene in front of our distant witnesses.
Instead,I said sharply, ‘You’re overdoing the role play, aren’t you, with that sort of comment? Especially as nobody can hear.’
He stopped dead, startling me into doing the same. I looked straight at him, trying in vain to detect the tiniest gleam of malice in his eyes; strange how the habit of self-preservation plays out.
Then he said softly, ‘Where does the role play end and the real playbegin?’
His question gave me goosebumps, in spite of the heat. It summed up my dilemma completely: by agreeing to this charade of a relationship, I was subjecting myself to a form of behavioural therapy. The flooding process, to be exact: putting myself into the very situation I feared and forcing myself to confront it head on. Of course, the flooding process would end with the visit toBill and Midge – but what about everything else? I wasn’t even certain what ‘everything else’ entailed; I just hoped that it was the revival of old memories and not the creation of new ones.
‘Come on,’ he said, ‘before the others catch us up.’
We walked on, still – bizarrely – holding hands, deep in our own thoughts. From time to time he broke the silence with some observation or other,but I kept my responses brief and unencouraging. As the surrounding fields and woods gave way to a grassy hillside, I focused on where I was placing my feet; no way was I going to trip into his arms like the night before. Only when we reached the cairn on Latrigg’s summit did I lift my head and take a proper look at the world around me.
