Page 96 of The Importance of Being Emma
He was persistent, I’d give him that. I decided to start at Ashridge and hope I never reached Forbury Manor. ‘I made a pass at her.’
‘What — in the middle of a mentoring session?’
‘Not exactly, but—’
‘You idiot. You bloody idiot.’ For a few moments, he was lost for words; then he went on, ‘I just can’t believe you’d do that. Does Henry know?’
‘Do you think I’d have been at Hartfield on Christmas Day if he did?’
‘True. And she told you where to go?’
‘Yes.’ Well, she had eventually, hadn’t she?
He gave a snort. ‘No wonder she can hardly bring herself to look at you. It must have felt almost incestuous.’
That really got under my skin. ‘But we’renotbrother and—’
‘I only said “felt”, Mark. Calm down, for God’s sake,’ he said sharply. ‘So when did you start fancying her?’
‘Oh, I don’t know. I suppose it was back in September, as soon as I saw her again . . . No, maybe it was long before that, maybe I’ve always fancied her, even though I didn’t realise it at the time.’ I paused and decided I may as well come out with it. ‘Actually, it’s much more than that. I love her, I want to spend the rest of my life with her. Except it’s all gone pear-shaped.’
He wasn’t listening; he was off down Memory Lane. ‘That’s just like me with Izzy. I woke up one day and suddenly it all fell into place, that she was the one, that she’d always been the one. Although she took some persuading at first, she wouldn’t even—’
I tried again. ‘John, there’s something else. Emma and I — we got drunk at the Highbury Foods Christmas do. And — and somehow we ended up in bed together.’
That guaranteed his undivided attention.
‘Jesus.’ He let out a long noisy breath. ‘A bit more than a pass, then.’
‘Yes. We had a blazing row the next morning, about various things.’ I swallowed. ‘I was a substitute, you see, for — well, it doesn’t matter who. And it’s been — difficult — ever since.’
‘You’re telling me! So you still fancy her, but she fancies someone else.’ He gave a short laugh. ‘And really, how could she fancy you anyway?’
‘Thanks a bunch.’
‘Look, for years you’ve been that annoying old fart who lectures her at the slightest opportunity. More of an older brother, even a father figure at times, definitely not boyfriend material. You must see that, surely?’
‘I think I get the picture,’ I said, through gritted teeth.
‘Sorry, it’s just — I don’t know, I suppose I just can’t get my head round it, you with her. And yet I fell for Izzy, so why shouldn’t you fall for her little sister?’ He paused. ‘I don’t suppose you want me to tell her? Izzy, that is?’
‘God, no. That would be even worse than telling Henry.’
‘So what happens now? How are you both going to deal with this?’
I cleared my throat. ‘It’ll be fine once I go back to India. We won’t meet for a while and when we do — well, we’ll be different people, in different situations.’
‘I hope you’re right. It’s a shame, though.’
‘What — me going back to India?’
‘I meant it’s a shame about you and Emma not working out. Come to think about it, you’ve got a lot in common. You’d have made a great couple.’
For a split second, his words created a seductive image of what might have been; Emma and I, a great couple. Then reality hit home.
‘But now we’ll never know,’ I said lightly. ‘By the way, will you be at the Westons’?’
‘Yes, the babysitter’s sorted and Izzy’s delirious at the prospect of seeing David Perry for a whole evening. Poor sod, I have a horrible feeling she’ll treat him like a walking talking medical dictionary. What about you?’
