Page 76 of Guided by the Stars
It’s moments like these that make me question everything about the past few weeks. I kidnapped this girl and planned to trade her for freedom. Some half-baked idea that Hades likely would have backed out of in the end. And yet here she is, comforting me and showing me more affection than I’ve ever known. It’s as if the stars were shining down on me after an eternity of darkness, and now I’m not sure I could live without the light.
“Things were fine for a while, I was young and she was the only female figure in my life. I would follow her around the garden, helping her plant herbs and picking flowers for her hair. But things changed when my powers showed up,” I say, my voice coming out raw. “I remember the first day my water abilities came, I couldn’t wait to show them. I called Hades and Persephone out to the garden and showed them how I could move the water from a bucket to the plants without touching it. He stormed off before the bucket was empty and she followed him. I was so worried I had done something wrong, so ashamed of what I’d done.”
“I don’t understand,” she replies, a frown on her face. “What’s wrong with being able to manipulate water?”
“That gift comes from my mother. She was a water nymph, and as soon as Hades saw what I could do it’s like someone flipped a switch. He was desperate to find her, neglecting his duties, me, and even Persephone.”
Adriane is silent, somehow knowing that I need time to process my thoughts before I continue. “Not long after, a great eagle soared into the mouth of the Underworld carrying a letter and a coin for the ferryman. The note was from Lileah and it explained why she left. She said she fell in love with someone else and she knew if he found out he’d never let her leave. What she didn’t expect, however, was to become pregnant with twin boys, each with a different father. She kept the other child and gave me up after sensing the darkness inside me. She feared what would happen when I got older.”
I look down and see a tear escape Adriane’s beautiful blue eyes. As I reach up to wipe it away, I ask if she wants me to stop, but she shakes her head.
“Hades was furious. I didn’t fully understand what was happening at the time, but that’s when everything shifted. He couldn’t stand the sight of me, even more so if he caught me playing with water.” I shudder at the memory of being forced to endure his wrath for something I didn’t know how to control.
“I’m guessing this affected your relationship with Persephone?” she asks.
“Always so perceptive, Red,” I respond, kissing her hair. “Any relationship I had with her was long gone. I was a reminder of too many painful things, and she’s a jealous, vindictive creature. Their relationship was strained for a while, but they eventually found a mutual target for all their hatred. Anyway, later that same year we found out who Lileah’s other family was. But we also found out she died, and apparently it was my fault.” The memory creeps through my mind likesmoke, the cruel words he’d thrown at me, the pain I’d felt. I might not have known her, but the pit in my chest was there all the same. A cavernous hole filled with self-loathing.
“How in the ever loving fuck was it your fault? And even if it was, that’s not something you tell a child!” Adriane exclaims, the indignation in her eyes easing a bit of my pain.
“We were told it was my darkness that caused it, seeping in at birth and tainting her soul, consuming her bit by bit until she died.”
Arms wrap around me, squeezing tight. “I’m so sorry you had to go through that. And, for the record, having a dark soul isn’t a bad thing. It’s what we do with it that matters. I’m not scared of your darkness, Kai. I’ve been here for what feels like forever, and you haven’t once harmed me.”
My heart aches at her words, at the nonchalant way she brushes off my involvement in this. “How can you say that? You’re here because of me, they took you to Tartarus because of me. I haven’t pressed you for information because I’m hoping you’ll come to me on your own, but I’ve already harmed you Adriane. Don’t you see that?”
She shifts, turning on the bed to face me. “I’m only going to say this once, so listen up and listen good. You are not your father,” she says, the conviction clear in her tone. “He’s a goddamn psychopath, and he uses his darkness in twisted, fucked-up ways. You may not want to admit it, but you’ve protected me from him since I got here. You’ve given me hope for myself and those who hold my heart.”
Her small hands grasp my face and our eyes meet. “We both have darkness inside us, don’t you feel how they call to each other?”
I pull her onto my lap and our lips meet, passion flaring to life as we pull each other closer. It’s moments like thesethat feel as if our souls join, melding together as one before we’re ever close enough.
Her stomach rumbles, loud and angry. She pulls away from me, laughing as she hides her face in my neck. “How about you hop in the shower, and I’ll go get some food?” I ask.
She leans back further, her eyes roaming over my body. “Or you could join me?” she says, her eyes sparkling with lust as she bites her lip.
My thumb pulls her lip free, her eyes darkening as I lean in close, our lips almost touching. “You’ll need some energy for what I have in mind,” I say, and bite her bottom lip.
I stand and carry her to the bathroom, slowly easing her down my body until she’s steady on her feet. “Go,” I say, slapping her ass. “Take your time, food will be here when you’re done.”
When I hear the shower running, I open the door and find Jax standing guard in the hallway. “Come in. We don’t have much time before she’s out of the shower and we need a plan.”
He follows me in and we each take a seat on the couch. I blow out a breath and think through our options, though none are good. The sad fact of the matter is that I can’t leave. I’m marked by Hades, and he’d tear the world apart to find me and bring me back. To hell with the living, with humans. He’d harm them all before letting me go. It would be the ultimate act of treason, leaving him to go live amongst the humans, to protect one.
But I can’t show my true strength, either. I’ve hidden it for so long because of how he’d react. He’d throw a tantrum, fearful that I’d want to dethrone him and take over as King of the Underworld. No fucking way would I want that, though. All I want is to be free from here, free to make my own choices and do what I want. Free to be with her.
“We have the helmet now,” I say to Jax, the palms of my hands pressed to my eyes. “We just have to get her to the ferry. As long as she wears it she can cross undetected. But then what? She wears the stupid fucking helmet for the rest of her life?”
I’m spiraling out of control, my mind ticking through each possibility and their inevitable failure. My legs are restless, and I pace to relieve some energy. Jax says nothing as he watches me ramble on. His brow is creased, eyes shifting like he can’t quite figure out how to handle me.
“What? Just spit it out, Jax.”
“I’ll take her,” he blurts out, continuing on before I can protest. “I know what you’re gonna say, but he won’t be able to track me. He can’t, not if I don’t want him to.”
My blood turns cold, rushing through my veins like a tsunami. “What are you talking about?” I ask, my voice shaky despite my efforts to keep calm.
“I can sort of…shield myself,” he explains, a sigh leaving his lips as he stands. “Listen, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before but—”
Everything inside me shatters, the bond we’ve forged over the centuries, the trust I had in him, it all crumbles to dust. The shadows gather close, converging on him, and before I realize it, I’m using them to push him against the wall. “You’ve been fucking lying to me? After everything we’ve been through, after what we’ve hidden from Hades about my own powers, and all this time you’ve been lying about yours?”
