Page 31 of Call My Bluff
“No.”
“Then the long version, for sure,” she insisted.
A faint smile pulled at Noah’s mouth. “Alright, well, like all ridiculous Watson’s stories, this one starts with Simon.”
“Of course.”
“He told the new grocery supervisor black-eyed peas aren’t that popular around here, and that we didn’t need to worry about stocking any extra for the holiday.”
“Are you serious?” Olivia interrupted. “New Year’s Day is the only time black-eyed peasarepopular!”
“I know, right? He’s a genius,” Noah went on. “Anyway, we ran out early in the week, and apparently, we can’t restock now because every warehouse in the southeast is empty. So we had to enforce a limit: one bag or two cans of peas per paying customer, no exceptions.”
Olivia snorted in disbelief. She, like every other good Southerner, would have ham and peas and collard greens in the morning to bring good luck for the new year. It was tradition, and hadbeentradition, for generations; any store having a purchase limit was bound to bring trouble.
“So, fast-forward to this morning,” Noah continued. “I’m standing by my register when I hear yelling from aisle nine, which happens to be—”
“—where the peas are,” Olivia finished.
“Exactly. So, Josh and I go over to investigate.”
“Wait, who’s Josh?”
“A guy from the stockroom,” Noah clarified. “Anyway, we go over to see what the problem is, and this little old lady has four bags of peas in her cart—the last four bags from the shelf. Another older woman is yelling at her, pointing to all the limit signs and lecturing her on being selfish during a holiday. I try to politely point out that the second lady is right and we can only allow one bag per customer, but then the first woman shoves her cart at the second woman, who falls down. Then, she swings her purse at me and hits me square in the chest!”
“Poor baby!” Olivia cooed, but Noah went on as if she hadn’t interrupted.
“Now, normally, this wouldn’t be a problem since I’m built like a tank—”
“Naturally.”
“—but this time, her bag washeavy! Like bricks-in-the-bottom heavy. And when it hit the floor, itclanked.”
Olivia gave an exaggerated gasp.
“I know, right? So now we’ve got store security coming to break up an old lady fightandfind out why her bag is makingmetallic noises. Turns out, she had three more cans of peas and a tub of frozen whipped cream in there! I have a bruise!”
Olivia couldn’t help it—she laughed out loud. “You really were attacked by somebody’s grandma!” she managed, forcing the words out between giggles.
“You thought I was lying, didn’t you?” he accused, though he looked like he was trying not to smile. “I had to fill out an employee incident report and everything!” His face suddenly sobered. “And of course Simon felt the need to yell at me in front of the staff because apparently customer violence is somehow my fault.”
Olivia pressed her lips together, her laughter all played out. “I’m sorry,” she said.
“And then it wasalsomy fault when some idiot almost backed his car into me in the parking lot because apparently it’s hard to see a line of twenty shopping carts moving through your rearview mirror,” Noah bit out, looking back down at the floor. He sounded disgusted.
Olivia chewed on the inside of her cheek and thought about his story. “Maybe he deserved the snake,” she admitted, and Noah’s eyes flicked up to hers.
“Yeah, he did,” he said with a sigh. “But he hated me before that.” Then he leaned back, mirroring her position from across the coffee table. “And I should just be grateful to have a job, right? Even if the guy in charge uses me as a doormat?”
She tilted her head from one side to the other. “You’re allowed to be upset about it,” she acknowledged. “But graduation is coming, and then you’ll be done, right?”
He sighed again and ran his hand down his face in resignation. “Yeah, but it can’t come soon enough,” he muttered.
Olivia circled one of her ankles and flexed her toes inside her heels. She’d never seen this side of Noah before—the one that wasn’t all fun and games. It was actually a bit disconcerting. “If you could fast-forward time, would you?” she asked suddenly. It was one of the questions she and her brothers had debated many times on long car rides, and it felt relevant.
Noah looked at her for a moment, understandably confused. “What?”
She shrugged and flexed her ankles again. “It’s pretty self-explanatory,” she said. “If you had the power to fast-forward time and skip the parts you didn’t like, would you do it?”
