Page 35 of Playing With Secrets
She comes back and heads toward Aiden. “I like my place. It’s cozy. It may be small, but I don’t need a lot.”
Her soul-gripping eyes catch mine. Now that Hunter’s gone, my anger falls away. My love for her swells, making me want to comfort her so she knows she’s not alone.
Our loss has to be killing her inside because it is me, and I didn’t have to go through the physical part. I can only imagine the depth of her grief.
She breaks our stare and glances away from me like she doesn’t know me. A smoke screen shrouds her face to hide anything she may be feeling.
My insides squeeze, and a ball of grief gets shoved downmy throat. It’s torture to see her and not be able to talk to her about what’s going on. It’s tearing me apart.
I need to leave to escape my agony. “If you’ll excuse me, I need to use your bathroom.”
“Of course. You know where it is.” She sits next to Aiden as I rush to her restroom.
As soon as I close the door, I grasp the counter and take a deep breath to avoid my emotions. This would’ve helped, except a sanitary pad container is in my sight.
Yesterday comes crashing down on me. The open box can only mean one thing. Our baby is gone. A wave of nausea hits me hard.
My chest tightens, and I rub my hand over it to relieve the pain. It’s almost unbearable.
Swords fly toward me from the invisible knife thrower by the name of misery and each one cuts deep into me. One after another, they slice through my heart. My mouth dries and I can barely swallow as hopelessness consumes me.
I thought this bathroom would be a barrier from all the pain of a future lost, but it’s not. This is a slow, torturous room of hell.
I want to run out of here and grab her by the wrist. Then pull her out the door and out of this city so we can start a life in a new place with new hope—a place where the love between us is accepted and not crippled by all of our suffering.
I throw some water on my face, get myself together, and open the bathroom door to find Aiden and Dori sitting on the couch.
He’s got his arm around her, and her head is on his shoulder. Their relationship has always been close like this, and the thought of it makes me drenched in guilt.
“Dori doesn’t feel well, so she’s staying home from work. Since we can’t go to breakfast like originally planned, I told her I’d go get her some coffee and juice.”
“She can’t have coffee or orange juice.” The words fall out of my mouth without thinking.
Fuck!
I’m usually better when it comes to formulating what I want to say. But when it comes to her, I’ve got loose lips with a mind of their own.
“Why can’t she have coffee or orange juice?” Aiden glances at me with a mix of confusion and anger bunched on his face.
Her head lowers as I clamor for words. “Because, you know. She’s been sick.”
“If she didn’t want them, she would’ve told me.” Aiden eyes me up and down.
I growl my annoyance.
“What’s with you, Jami? You’re acting very protective of her. And if I didn’t know better, you and her boss have some animosity going on. I know you and there’s more to this story.” He moves his arm away from Dori and stands.
My eyes shift between Dori and Aiden. She won’t look up, so I’m on my own. Not shocking since I’m always on my own when it comes to her.
“Aiden, she’s not feeling well. Everyone knows coffee and juice are highly acidic. She might want them, but they won’t help her feel better. She should be drinking water and bland tea. I need her back at work as soon as possible.”
I drive my hands on my hips and stare. “We have a launch that has to go off without any problems. She’s directly involved, so if you’re reading into me being protective, you’re damn right I am. My business is riding on this, so I want her better.”
“Jami’s right, Aiden. I’ve dropped the ball a few times. I’d be surprised if I have a job if this launch fails. I’m still queasy and as much as those sound nice, they would upset my stomach. I’ll stick to water and make some tea.”
Aiden runs a suspicious eye over her. “Are you sure? I don’t mind bringing you some if you want.”
“No, that won’t be good for me.” She smiles his way. “If you’ll give me a minute, I need to use the bathroom.”
