Page 93 of Playing the Game
I pad over and sit next to her. “You’re right. I should’ve believed in us, but I was worried about how Lauren would be with you. I wanted to fix everything first—put it in a box and tie it up with a nice bow on top—to make it easy for you to be a part of my life.”
“You can’t make things perfect first and then ask me to be a part of your life. I need you to be open with me and communicate with me. Regardless of how bad things seem.”
“And I’m trying to do that.”
She nods in acknowledgment but isn’t done with the subject. “I deserve to know what’s happening in your life, especially when I’m directly involved. We can handle anything together if we are honest with each other.”
My insides twist into a knot. I’m horrified by how much I hurt her.
I run my hand over her thigh. “I’m sorry I kept things from you. It was inconsiderate of me. Everything you’re saying is right.”
“I’m not putting all the blame on you. I’ve got plenty of things I need to fix, but this is one thing I have to have if this is going to work out with us. You have to put your trust in me. Don’t keep me in the dark. No matter what the issue is.”
“I want that more than anything. We can do this, Dori. We can make it work if we agree to talk to each other, even when it’s about Hunter or your job or something you think I don’t want to hear about.”
She smiles warmly. “I know we can. I’ve always felt that we could be great together if we could only find our footingwith each other. The way I feel about you is like nothing I can explain.”
“I know what you mean.” I pull her to me so she’s standing between my legs and rest my hands on her hips.
She wraps her arms around my shoulders. “You do?”
I give her a quick kiss. “I do.”
“Then tell me how we get through this.”
“Easy. I do what you ask of me.”
“Which is?”
“You need me to be open with you about my problems and make you number one in my life. I understand that because I’ve learned by watching you with other men over the years.”
Sadness fills her expression. “You putting me first sounds a little selfish on my part.”
“No, it doesn’t. We’re partners now, and that means you’re my priority.”
“And you’re mine.”
“There’s something I want you to understand, Dori. You’ve always been number one for me. I’ve just gone about showing you I love you the wrong way.”
She forces out a laugh. “We both have, but I want this to work, Jami. I really do.”
“So do I, which is why I’m going to ask something of you.”
Her forehead crinkles. “What?”
My heart rate kicks up. “You want open communication and to know you’re number one in my life. That won’t be difficult for me, but what I need from you could be problematic.”
“Why? What exactly do you want me to do?”
“If we’re going to learn to trust each other, I can’t have you locking me out and shutting down on me.”
“That’s a fair request. And believe me, I don’t plan on doing that anymore. It just causes more problems.”
“Good. I’m glad you realize that.” I squeeze her waist. “There’s something more I need from you.”
“Why do you have the fear of God spilling from your eyes?” She steps back with her expression full of worry. “Why do I feel like our entire relationship hinges on how I respond to this?”
CHAPTER 21
