Page 126 of The Surrender
And a liar and a cheat and a vengeful, immoral bastard.
“It’s over,” I reiterate, the words fighting past the lump in my throat. Any contact I must have with him going forward will be transactional. “And, honestly, I’m fine, so please stop worrying.”Save your worry for when I drop the baby bomb.“I’m starving. What’s for dinner?”
I go back into the kitchen and check the pot on the stove, lifting the lid. “Mm,” I hum when the steam rises and a waft of rich gravy hits my nose. “Casserole?”
“Beef.”
“Amelia,” Dad sings, coming in from the garden. “Did you see the flowers Jude sent for you?”
“Yeah, Dad. I saw them.”
He looks around. “Where is he?”
Oh my God.I look at Mum, who shifts, awkward, her eyes begging me not to tell him. “Jude and I split up,” I say, aiming for assertive, but I know I sound as defeated as I feel. Mum deflates, and I give her sorry eyes. There’s no point delaying the inevitable.
“What?” Confusion invades every inch of Dad’s face.
“It didn’t work out.”
“Didn’t work out? How ridiculous. We spent most of the weekend with you both. I’ve never seen you smile so much. And ... and ... and I like him!”
Guilt flares, for a reason I never imagined. “I know you did, Dad. I’m sorry.” This is bizarre. And fucking painful.
“This doesn’t make any sense.” Dad looks between us, wounded as he drops to a chair. “I don’t mean to be judgy, darling, but what are you thinking?”
Judgy.We’ll see how judgy he gets when I tell him he’s going to be a granddadandI’m not with the baby’s father.
“He loves you.”
“He doesn’t love me, Dad,” I assure him. I was just a pawn to him, and suddenly everything we shared is null and void. Meaningless. He wanted me to fall in love with him, and I did. Job done. I’m not going back so Jude Harrison can prolong Nick’s punishment. “I need some air,” I say, leaving them in the kitchen whispering angrily to each other, and heading out the front. I sit on a wall and take a moment to myself, trying not to fall victim to my memories again. Impossible.
How the hell did I end up here?
My attention is caught when I see a car pull into the cul-de-sac. Nick’s car. “Is he for real?” I whisper, standing from the dwarf wall. The anger is reignited as I wander to the end of the path to meet him on the pavement. Has he come to make me feel even stupider? Does he expect me to fall into his arms, sob and apologise?
“You need to leave,” I say, my tone defensive and hostile. “You can’t just keep turning up at my parents’ house, Nick.” Is he hoping for an ally in Dad?
“I thought . . .”
Oh my God, he does. He thinks there’s a chance? After everything? I laugh under my breath and turn, walking back to the house, hoping that simple reaction tells him what he needs to know with no further energy drained. But then something comes to me, and I stop.
“Why did you change your name?” I ask, facing him.
The wave of surprise that crosses his face can’t be hidden. “What?”
“Your name.”
“Is that what he told you?” He stands taller in some kind of pathetic display of strength. It’s defensive. And really fucking suspicious.
“No, it’s what Clark told me.” Wide eyes stare back at me, and I tilt my head, suddenly interested. “Why did you change your name, Nick?”
“My mum remarried after my dad died,” he says, his words rushed.
“Wait. Your dad died?”
“Yes, my dad died.”
“And you didn’t think to tell me that?” We were together for five years!
