Page 71 of When Monsters Fight
The itch to run free, to feel a real breeze on my face, to touch the earth outside gnaws at me.
My quarters feel like a cage—too small and constrictive—and the conversation with the celestial circles my mind like a vicious vulture.
“What happened to the alpha team wasn’t your fault,” Oliver says. “We took a risk because we needed to. It’s what your father would have done.” He looks perfectly relaxed lounging on the sofa, ankle resting on his knee, but I know his tell—the bobbing of that knee—he’s on edge.
I meet his gaze with a steady one of my own. “We lost twenty men and women because of that one risk. Twentyhumans lost is twenty too many. We’re going extinct, Oliver. I need to keep us alive.”
“There’ll be no life if the Dominion win. Gabriel is right, they’ll find us, and when they do, we’ll be prisoners living to serve them. You know what happens to humans in the Golden City.”
Yes. Yes, I know. Father hadn’t kept that information a secret from us here at the base. He believed we needed to know what was at stake. If he hadn’t gotten sick…If he hadn’t died…
“He believed you’d make a good leader,” Oliver says. “And so do I. You’ve done a fine job, and I’ve had no quarrel with any of your decisions up until now.”
Ouch. That hurts. But honestly, who am I kidding? My gut is in knots with conflict, with doubts, and this man…this beautiful man who’s managed to get under my skin and into my heart, knows it.
He knows me. “Our people are no match for the celestials. They’ll merely be a diversion. Cannon fodder.”
“And you know that the celestials will do their best to avoid killing any humans,” he points out. “We’re too valuable to them.”
The knots in my stomach spawn more knots, leaving me nauseous. “You’re not going to let this go, are you?”
“No. I believe that our troops should be given a choice.”
“So that I can absolve my guilt?”
“No, so they don’t blame you for keeping freedom out of their grasp.”
Fuck. This role…This responsibility feels suddenly too big. “You should have been general not me. I should be working under you, not the other way around.”
The corner of his mouth tips up. “There is one place youcan work under me,andon top of me.” He rises and moves toward me. “Any position you like…”
My blood heats, and I reach up to loop my arms around his neck. “I’d like that.”
He brushes his lips against mine once, then again, this time with a little more pressure. My pulse spikes in anticipation, but he pulls away, his pupils dark and hungry.
“I love you, Lila, and everything is going to be okay.”
I need to hear it, even if it might not be true. “Come on, let’s go give our people a choice.”
Chapter 37
SHEM
Michael’s sapphire eyes blaze with triumph as his blade pierces my heart.
My heart.
Rue.
I’m sorry.
A wave of dark sorrow washes over me because I’ll never see her again. Never hold her again. Please don’t break, my love. Don’t let this destroy you. You’re stronger than this.
Michael orders his men to retreat as darkness grips me.
I’m dying.
But it’s all right.
