Page 11 of The Stone Curse
“And Levi is joining us later.”
My stomach tightened. “Oh.”
“I heard your conversation with him outside the main building.”
“You did?”
She winced. “I think everyone in the hallway did.”
“Shit.” I stood and began to pace. “I don’t know why I got so mad at him.”
“You’re hurting, and you need to lash out, and Levi is a safe option. You know he’ll take the tongue-lashing. You know he loves you too much to hate you. Too much to walk away.”
“That’s not true. Derek loves me more. I could take it out on…on…” But Derek was a part of me, my responsibility to love and care for, and there was no way I would ever hurt him, but Levi…Levi was strong enough to take it. Take my shit and still be here. “I hate that you’re right.”
She pulled me into a hug. “I hate that you’ve turned me into a hugger.”
I laughed into her shoulder. “I love that you’re a hugger now.” I pulled away slightly. “And I’m sure Derek will appreciate it too.”
She blinked sharply, looking away. “What has Derek got to do with anything?”
I tried to catch her eye. “He loves hugs.”
Twin spots of color bloomed on her cheeks. “Hugs from you.”
“Hugs from the people he cares about and who care about him…”
She met my gaze levelly. “I do care about him.”
“I think it’s more than care, isn’t it?”
She looked away again. Was she hiding her joy because I was grieving? “Shar…you can be happy. I would never begrudge you that. Iwantyou to be happy. Being in love is…It’s beautiful and wonderous. Please don’t hold back on account of me. I’d hate that.”
She exhaled. “I know. It isn’t that. Well not entirely…” She gave me a sheepish smile. “The timing is all wrong. Maybe once we have Romi back. Once the graynite threat is dealt with…Maybe then, but not now. Now isn’t the time to start anything, and I’m happy with that.”
I studied her for a moment, looking for any signs of deception and finding none. “Okay. I believe you. Speaking of Derek, where is he?”
“Training with Yarrow. He’s determined to be an asset to the elite.”
He’d been training a lot since the attack. Yarrow had even given him a special bracelet to help ground him. The goal was to help Derek become his own person, completely independent from me, so that he didn’t need my energy but could use his own. He’d still be my shield but by choice. We’d still have a bond, but he wouldn’t be reliant on my existence to live.
I wanted that for him. “He’s already an asset. He’s saved my life on more than one occasion.”
“I know, but after what happened…”
“That wasn’t his fault.” I’d made Yarrow keep him away from the cadet exams. I’d made him promise to keep Derek in lockdown. “That was all on me.”
“He understands that now, but I think he wants to make sure it never happens again.” The corner of her mouth lifted, and her gaze grew soft. “He’s pretty amazing.”
“Yes, he really is.”
There was another knock on the door, and Orix popped his head in. “Food’s ready, and I have to say, it smelled delicious.”
“Curi?” Shar and I asked in unison.
Orix’s eyes crinkled in a smile. “Why don’t you come and see?”
Shar and I exchanged glances before following Orix down to the second floor where delicious aromas danced on the air. My stomach grumbled in appreciation. I’d eaten on autopilot, keeping fueled so that I could function, but the desire for food had died with Serath.
