Page 23 of Damned and Broken Gods
“I found it a year ago,” he said proudly. “Some of the drohi know of it, but not all of them. It’s a sanctuary if we need. A hiding place if we desire.” He pointed to the large platform above. “There’s a tunnel up there. It leads to the forest and the rakshasa bridges.”
“The rakshasa have their own bridge off Prashikshan?”
“Yes, the bridge you arrived on is only for drohi and their demigods.”
“Why did you bring me here? Why show it to me?”
“Because…because I wanted to give it to you.” His voice softened. “This part of me. A parting gift.”
My throat pinched. “What? You’re leaving? You didn’t tell me?” I injected humor into my tone even though my heart was hammering.
“Not yet, but soon. If you keep your vow, then soon…”
If…I could break it. I could keep him with me. Make him stay until he understood that his war didn’t have to happen. Until he changed his mind and…What kind of monster would that make me? Using my power against him?
“Leela?” He hooked a finger under my chin and lifted my gaze to his. “You could come with me.”
My heart thumped hard. “What?”
“Once you ascend, once you free me, you could come with me. See the world as I have seen it.”
My stomach flipped. To be with him, to be free with him. To see his world with him. To stay…with him. A deep tug bloomed beneath my ribs, a sharp yearning. I reveled in it for a moment, letting it rise, allowing it to touch my heart for a fraction of a second before exhaling and pushing it away. Because what he was offering could never be.
“Leela?” He stroked my bottom lip with his thumb, and my eyes fluttered closed. “We could be together,” he said, his voice an aching throb.
Oh gods…My eyes heated, and I breathed through my nose. “And then what? You want me to fight alongside you in a war I don’t agree with? A war I don’t think needs to happen?”
His expression shuttered. “No, I suppose it was a fanciful notion.” He lowered his hand, and I immediately missed his touch. “Once the bond is broken, this will be easier. Until then, we keep our distance as we have done so very well thus far.”
“Right.” Dammit, I would not cry.
His gaze softened, and he sighed, grazing a knuckle down my cheek. “The bond is strong. The promise of what could be is…intense. So we would be forgiven for tasting the possibilities. But every time we cross that line, we make it harder to return. You have a soft heart, Leela. I don’t want to bruise it. I believe, given true power and control, you would make a fine queen.”
“You don’t know that I won’t have control. Not for certain.”
He smiled wryly. “Then let us see how it unfolds once we are on opposite sides.” His gaze dropped to my lips, flicked back to my eyes, then down again, as if drawn to my mouth by an inexorable magnetic pull.
I found myself doing the same. Watching his mouth, aching to trace the curve of his top lip.
A soft growl vibrated in his throat, and he turned away, muttering to himself, words I didn’t understand.
“What?”
“Nothing,” he bit out. “We should go.” He strode for the stone door.
I ran to catch up, snagging his arm. “Araz, talk to me, please.” My voice trembled with emotions I didn’t understand. Emotions that felt too big. “Please. Talk to me. You brought me here, and now you’re mad at me?”
His shoulders heaved on a sigh. “I’m not mad at you, I’m angry with myself for my weakness, for dressing my own desires in lies.” He turned to me, his eyes bright. “I brought you here not to gift you this sanctuary but to share it with you. A part of me, because I want to be closer. I need it. Like breathing. Like the very air. And it enrages me that I could be so weak.”
I let go of his arm, burned by his words. “So wanting me is a weakness now?”
He exhaled, breathing away his angst and turmoil so his face smoothed out to an expressionless mask. “Yes. Wanting you is a weakness I cannot afford.”
His words landed like a slap. “Well, you won’t have to want me for much longer. Like you said, the bond will be broken soon enough.” I slipped past him and through the door, eager to get away from him and the conflicting emotions his declaration evoked. Heat spiraled in my chest at his callousness, while an ache bloomed in my heart at his plight because it wasmyplight too. If we did end up on opposite ends of a war, then wanting him could ultimately bemyweakness.
Chapter 8
The Secret Storyteller
