Page 31 of Damned and Broken Gods
I’d do it. I’d show him it was possible.
He tipped his head back against the seat and closed his eyes, clearly done with conversation. Good. That was good. Because I was done talking too. It was time for some action. The sooner I ascended, the sooner I could start making changes.
The Sabha couldn’t come soon enough.
Chapter 10
If The Past Could Be Undone…
ARAZ
If I keep my eyes closed, I won’t have to look at her. I can block out the yearning that claws at me constantly, for a little while at least.
Close quarters with her like this, her scent saturating the air, it’s impossible not to feel.
Not to want.
Like this, my imminent return to a place that holds painful memories feels almost bearable.
For a moment, I’m back in the confines of the stone cell. Wrist manacles too large for a child, bound to my ankles instead.
Herscreams fill my head, echoing around me. Defiant, desperate, agonized.
Before the bond. Before Leela, the memory was shrouded in gray smoke, wisps of color breathing through every now and then, but now the breaks in the fog are larger, last longer, and I see more. Remember more.
Be strong, Maloch…the name…myname from before. The name they took from me. My lungs tighten. My eyes burn.
Be strong, my son…
Her eyes, wide and as blue as the winter sky on a cloudless day, peer into my soul, pouring purpose and strength into me.
Hold me in your heart.
Do not forget.
Never forget.
But I did forget…for a while. I forgot too much.
They almost won.
I can’t let them win. I can’t let the injustice and lies continue. I won’t be swayed. I can’t allow it.
Not even for her.
I draw a breath, allowing Leela’s jasmine scent to fill my senses. My heart softens, yearning tugging at the deepest hidden parts of me.
This is my test.
She is my temptation.
I won’t succumb, because to do so would be to doom my people.
I open my eyes to find her watching me with a softness that makes my soul ache. She quickly masks her emotions and fixes her attention out the window, looking to the shifting blanket of stars.
Her heart is too big, and her empathy will be her downfall. I cannot allow myself to care beyond the terms of our deal.
This Sabha can’t come soon enough.
