Page 27 of Wild Ever After
Chapter Five
Bella stared across the room at her husband. What was she saying? What could she say that would make this all go away and give them a path to heal?
“Someone tried to ruin us. Not just you, Harry. Me, too. It was my life as much as it was yours and ours together. I deserved to fight for it.”
“I was trying to protect you.”
“I know. I do. But this…” She pushed back the sleeve of the robe to expose her wrist and the steel that encircled it. “This binds me to you, yes. It also binds you to me. We own each other. That’s what you told me when you placed it on me. We belong to each other. We face things together. We protect each other. Only you didn’t let me. You didn’t let me face it with you.”
“Bella…”
“You sent me away, Harry. You pushed me away from you and from us when you did that.”
Bella choked her tears down and saw the moment realization began to dawn. “I begged and I pleaded with you to let me stay, to let me help. Over and over you said no. Over and over you told me you’d handle it. You shut me out ofourlife, Harry. And you want me to come back? Now when the dust has settled and everything is smoothed out, you want me to come back and be part of your life again?”
“Our life,” he said softly.
“Not by that definition.”
“Then by what? It was never meant to be for this long.”
She didn’t know the answer to that. “I know, but I wasn’t ready and I don’t know when I will be. I began making a life here. I haven’t had a life apart from you or our kids since college.”
“I see.”
“I don’t think you do. I loved every piece of my life with you. As your lover, your submissive, your wife, and the mother of your children.”
“Loved? Are you saying you don’t want it anymore? Are you saying you don’t want me anymore?” He swallowed and in the quiet stillness of the room, she heard it. She heard the gulp of air. “Are you saying you want me to take your collar off?”
That was the biggest question of all for her and though she asked herself that question multiple times over the last year, to hear the words come out of his mouth, to hear them spoken out loud…
“I…” She couldn’t… Didn’t know how to answer him.
If she said yes and he uncollared her, a divorce would likely follow and she was fairly certain her heart wouldn’t be able to withstand that.
If she said no, what would happen? Would they return to business as usual with daily spankings and nightly bondage? Would he expect her to move back to Charleston? Give up teaching? Okay, no. He wouldn’t ask her to give up teaching. He didn’t ask her to do it the first time. She chose to devote her time to him, the success of his career, their children, and their community.
Harry pierced her with his eyes. He was primarily in shadow, but those gray eyes reached out and pinned her in place even as they beckoned her knees to fold under.
She was torn.
“You broke my heart when you sent me away, Harry.” She hadn’t expected a tear to drop down her cheek, hadn’t realized she was as close to crying as she apparently was, but tears didn’t lie. Not in this case. “You broke my heart.”
“Why did you cry last night during your spanking?”
Shock hit her first. Anger, followed by hurt surged inside her.
Didn’t he care about what she’d just said? Didn’t he care that he’d hurt her heart that badly?”
“Answer me, Bella. Why did you cry during your spanking last night?”
More tears joined the first. Wetness rolled down her face, over her chin, down her throat, and between her breasts, which were loosely covered by the robe.
“Did it hurt?”
“Y-yes. You know it did. I told you that.”
“I do know, yes. Was there any other reason for your tears?”
