Page 91 of All That Glitters
“We need to stop this and we need to get back to the conference room.”
“Tell him you want to drive again.”
“No.”
“Tell him you’ll take my seat until I’m ready.”
“Ash…”
“I’ll do whatever I have to do to be ready by Sebring next year.”
“That’s not fair, Ashton.”
“Tell him. Don’t take whatever fucking marketing job he wants to offer. Take a seat in the car. I’ll take the job and I’ll work with you, work with everyone else he hires. I’ll work so you can race Daytona next year. Maybe even get you in a race this season.”
“I…” I took a shaky breath, a deep one that hurt me all the way to my toes. “I can’t.”
“Coward.”
I could do nothing more than nod my head as a lone tear fell. Then another one. And one more before I swiped them away. “Bastard.”
“Through and through.” He regarded me and though we stood mere inches apart, a chasm formed and we were miles apart. “You can leave. I’ll make your excuses and I’ll find another way home.”
“Ashton.”
“Go, Helen. We’re done here.”
The look on his face before he turned away would haunt me forever. The anger, the disappointment, the emotion buried deep within all turned that imaginary blade and sliced through every part of me that kept me whole and moving through my life like nothing was ever wrong.
He walked back to the conference room door and disappeared inside.
I don’t know how long I stood there in the hallway, torn between following Ashton and doing as he told me to do and leave.
I finally moved and would later wonder how I got downstairs to the parking lot and outside. My mind ran through the whole conversation as I made my way back home. I wasn’t even paying attention, simply relying on muscle memory. He threw it all away because I wouldn’t do what he wanted. Was he so used to getting his way that he couldn’t see that maybe there were reasons I couldn’t give in? And yeah, I lied to him. I told him it didn’t mean anything to me, that it was just something to do, when the truth was that it had meant everything to me to race with them… Brax, Hale, and Ashton.
I saw the entrance to our driveway a second before I needed to turn, earning me some squealing tires and a horn honking from behind. I didn’t blame the driver and for a moment, I debated just backing out and leaving again. I didn’t want to face Hale. I didn’t want to answer any of his questions. I didn’t want to argue and in my current state of mind I knew we would and I would have to bite my tongue again. I would have to lie to his face again. I would have to pretend again. I didn’t want to deal with any of it. I felt like a part of me was dying and I just wanted to be alone.
His Jeep was out front and I screamed in my head. I hadn’t been home since last night and I hadn’t checked in, either.
I wanted some peace, some time to pull myself together, to gather the shredded armor back around my body, but if I walked through the door to our house, I wasn’t going to get any of that.
Fuck.
21
Helen
“There you are.” Hale said as soon as I walked in. He was coming downstairs, a concerned look on his face. “I’ve been trying to call and it just kept going to voicemail.”
“Well… Here I am.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I’m just tired. I’m going to lay down for a bit.” I tried to edge around him, but he blocked me. “Not now,” I warned. “Please.”
I couldn’t remember a day when I’d used the word please so much.
“What did he do?”
