Page 163 of Toxic Salvation
“Stop,” Pavel says. “Don’t spiral. We don’t know what happened. And until we do, we can’t afford to panic.”
Except I am panicking. I’m panicking big time.
Because I’ve become complacent. The mother of my child had an appointment today and instead of being there myself, I sent her out into the world with four men who are clearly unqualified to protect her.
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
“Almost there,” Pavel says.
“Any luck getting through to Vesper?” Osip asks, meeting my eyes in the rearview mirror.
“She’s not answering,” I rasp. “She’s not answering because she probably can’t.”
“Kovan, we don’t know?—”
“Either that bastard has her. Or?—”
“Kovan, stop.”
“—he’s already killed her.”
Saying it out loud doesn’t make it better. It only doubles the panic. Only makes the fear that much more acute. The world feels out of my control. Because if Vesper is hurt—or worse: dead—then it’s over for me.
I may as well ask Ihor to put a bullet in my head, too, because there is no fucking point in my life without her here to share it.
Osip slams on the brakes, coming to an abrupt stop in front of the clinic. I run inside, ignoring the startled secretary in the ridiculous reading glasses as she tries to ask me for my name.
I turn the corner—and freeze.
Aleksei and Filipp’s backs are to me. They’re standing over a body, blood seeping onto the floor and flowing freely across the white tile.
It’s almost at Aleksei’s shoes, but he doesn’t seem to notice.
“No, no, no… Vesper,” I choke, pushing past Aleksei to get to my woman.
I drop to my knees on the floor, right in the puddle of blood, an anguished scream in the back of my throat, waiting to escape.
All it will take is one look at her face.
Except, when my eyes focus on the body, it’s not what I’m expecting. I don’t see her perfect blonde hair or her heart-shaped face. I don’t see Orion’s belt dancing across her right cheek.
What I see is a big, ungainly corpse, swathed in a dark suit.
“Nikolai,” I breathe, my hand falling heavily against his suited chest. “Fuck.”
“Tikhon is in there, boss,” Aleksei says. “W-we think he dragged himself into the examination room after he was stabbed… to help her…”
I jump to my feet and kick the door open. It swings back on its hinges and hits the back wall so hard that the whole room seems to tremble.
Or maybe it’s me—maybe I’m the one who’s trembling.
“Vesper!”
Again, I’m expecting to see her body, sprawled out on the floor, blood gushing out of her as she clings to life.
But she’s intact. She’s kneeling on the tile, her hand hovering on Tikhon’s chest as she sobs silently. I’m not sure if the blood she’s covered in is her own or someone else’s.
But she’s alive.
