Page 27 of Toxic Temptation
We finish the surgery using backup equipment and prayer. Robbie makes it through.
But barely. Just barely.
“I’m going to kill him.”
The doctors’ lounge door slams behind me with enough force to rattle the windows. My hands are shaking now, adrenaline and rage making them useless for anything requiring fine motor control.
“You need to calm down,” Amrita warns, following me inside.
I whirl on her. “We almost lost a child today because Jeremy Fleming won’t approve a single equipment upgrade. How exactly am I supposed to ‘calm down’ about that?”
Amrita pulls her hair from its ponytail, exhaustion pulsing in every line of her face. “It was my fault for using that machine. We all know it’s been glitchy.”
“No!” I pound my fist on the table, ignoring the pain that shoots up my arm. “That’s exactly the problem. We allknowthe equipment is failing, and we’re just working around it like it’s acceptable. Like,oopsie, sorry, Mom and Dad, guess your son died because the thingamabob didn’t work right!Do we just write those kids off? Is there a tax perk for that? More dead kids mean Christmas bonuses are higher?”
“What’s the alternative, Vesper?” she asks hopelessly. “We’ve tried everything. Committees, proposals, formal complaints. You know it as well as I do: Nothing changes.”
“Then we make it change.”
“How? What is there left to do?”
The helplessness in her voice breaks something inside me. Because she’s right. We’re fighting a war with water guns against an army with tanks.
Unless…
Unless we hadbackup.
“Vesper.” Amrita’s voice is gentler now. “You know I can’t stand with you on this, right? Not publicly, I mean.”
“Why the hell not?”
“You know why.”
I sink into the chair across from her. “Because you’re not white.”
“Because I’m expendable.” She meets my eyes without flinching. “Five doctors fired in two years. Three Black, two Asian. You think that’s a coincidence?”
Shame burns through me. I’d noticed the pattern, had even mentioned it to the board. But I’d never truly understood what it meant for my colleagues who don’t have the protection of being Thomas Fairfax’s daughter.
“I’m sorry?—”
“Don’t apologize. Just understand. You can afford to be righteous. The rest of us can’t.”
She’s right, but that doesn’t make the truth easier to swallow. I have privilege, and I’ve been wasting it on polite requests and proper channels.
Maybe it’s time to try a different approach.
“Uh-oh. I know that face. What are you thinking?” Amrita asks.
I stand up. “I’m thinking maybe it’s time to fight fire with fire.”
“What does that mean?”
I grab my lab coat, mind already racing with possibilities. I don’t know how I’ll find him or how I’ll convince him to help. But one way or another, I’m going to make this happen.
“It means I’m done asking nicely.”
10
