Page 79 of Toxic Temptation
“And? What’s the plan, hm? You going to be his mother now?”
“I never said?—”
“He’s living with you, isn’t he? Him and his hot uncle? It’s only a matter of time, wouldn’t you say?”
I turn and riffle through the few remaining oxygen masks, needing something to do with my hands, and catch my finger on an exposed nail. “Damn it!”
Charity holds out a hand. “Let me see.”
“It’s fine. I’m fine,” I insist yet again. But again, it’s a lie. Nothing’s fine. Not this conversation, not the way my life has been turned upside down, not the fact that I’m starting to care about people I’m supposed to walk away from.
Sighing, she hands me a strip of gauze. “You’re getting too attached.”
“I’m a grown woman. I can handle my emotions.”
“Can you? He’s gorgeous.”
“What does that have to do with anything?” I lash out bitchily. “I’m not on the market. And I don’t think he is, either.”
“If he was, would it matter?”
“No!”
Charity’s eyes widen. “Jeez. I’m just asking.”
I lower my voice. “Look, I care about Luka and I want to help. But I’m getting something out of this, too, remember?”
“Oh, yes, hon,” she says sadly. “I remember.”
“And as for Kovan,” I continue over her obvious doubt, “I think we can be friends. At least as far as this ruse goes.”
“Friends,” she echoes dubiously. “Friends.With a guy likethat.Honey…”
“We have things in common.” I focus on wrapping my finger with the gauze and, more importantly, avoiding her eyes. “We’ve both lost people. Neither of us does sentiment well. Friendships have been built on less.”
“Sure, fine, that’s valid. And after your deal is done, what then? You’ll walk away from both of them? Rinse your hands of the whole mess? Can you live with that?”
Her question lingers long after she’s finished asking it. I weigh what that would look like. Walk away from Luka’s gap-toothed smile and Kovan’s protective fury. Walk away from morning coffee and bedtime conversations and the feeling of being needed for something other than the scalpel in my hand for once.
“That’s the deal,” I say at last. “I have my career. I don’t have time for anything else.”
Charity’s expression says everything her words don’t.
“If you say so, Ves. If you say so.”
27
VESPER
I’ve had roommates for all of two seconds and still, the apartment now feels desolate and empty when I walk into it.
The sight of Luka’s Nikes goes a long way in helping my sour mood, though. Even seeing Kovan’s empty mug in the kitchen sink leaves a pleasant little tickle running down my spine.
How is it that they’ve managed to encroach into my life without me resenting the intrusion? It defies all logic.
Especially considering I’m a hermit who’s longed for solitude my entire life. Maybe it’s the nature of my job. Maybe it’s justmynature. Dad used to call me his little recluse.You’re the only kid I know who’d rather play with skeletons than real life children.
He wasn’t kidding, either. There’s a skeleton in the medical library at St. Raphael’s whom I considered my friend. I even named him. Tony. Because it rhymed with “Bony” and I thought that was funny. Now, if you asked anyone about the skeleton in the stacks, they all refer to Tony by name.
