Page 44 of Asphyxia
He did this.
Ruined me.
Destroyed any chance I had at being a woman worth wanting.
Instead, I was a twisted heart—mangled and mutilated into something only its creator could love.
What was the point of even trying anymore? There was nothing left of me.
Insanity. Rage. Madness.
“Now, that’s not true, is it sweetheart? I’d never serve you something on a silver spoon.” Adrian chuckled as he wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me into him as he murmured in his silky, seductive tone—the one that I could never refuse. “If I’ve taught you anything, it’s that you will lick it off knives like the good girl I trained you to be.”
Adrian tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear, his fingertips lightly grazing my cheek with the motion. I stared into his eyes as mine darkened with savage hate—seeing straight through the man who no longer held a soul.
Absolution.Retribution. Revenge.
“All that pent-up aggression and rage, eating you alive from the inside out.”
His words echoed on repeat in the deep recesses of my mind, and I wanted to fucking kill him.
Ithadbeenovera week since Chyler and I rescued Alexis, and I still didn’t feel like my usual self.
On the outside, I was fine—significantly quieter, but fine. While on the inside, I was lost in a void that Adrian had created within me yet again.
“So… what’s new with Madison this week?” Chyler hummed as she chewed a considerable chunk of her breakfast.
Chyler wanted to meet for coffee and a quick bite to eat before spending the day lazily strolling the stores downtown for new furniture.
She and Atlas had spent the last week searching for their dream home, waiting to hear back on an offer they had made only yesterday, and shopping was the easiest distraction—
“Madison.”
“Hm?” I glanced at her from across our table, my attention anywhere but here as she continued speaking. “I’m sorry… Did you say something?”
“Mads…” Chyler sighed, dropping her half-eaten bagel onto her plate and clearing her throat. “You know the guys talk. So it shouldn’t surprise you to know that I—”
“What?” I scoffed, interrupting her while crossing my arms as I slouched further into my chair. “That you know what?”
Of course, Marcus and Dean would gossip to Atlas and Derek about me… Why wouldn’t that surprise me?
“Hey, don’t rip my head off for caring just like you do with Marcus and Dean.” Chyler leveled me with a pointed glare. “They care about you, Mads... Fuck, Marcus loves your stubborn ass, for Christ’s sake. But that being said, I know you’re still struggling with the whole…Adrian reunion.”
“Reunion?” I laughed with hysterical sarcasm. “Reunion, as if I had planned to see him and let him destroy my sanity all over again for shits and giggles? Reunion, like I wanted to have to choose between my sisters and Dean in a life-or-death decision? Be real, Chy… It was no fucking reunion.”
“Yes, yes, okay… Sorry… No need to get your panties in a fucking twist.” Chyler back peddled, and I immediately felt bad for snapping at her; my stupid emotions were still running loose all over the goddamn map.
“No… You’re right, I’m sorry, Chy.” I breathed, reeling myself in as I stared at my latte. “I’m still just working through everything.”
And byworking through everything,I meant having endless nightmares about Adrian, losing sleep unless Dean or Marcus was there to hold me, and being unable to think straight at work.
“What can I do to help?” She asked, placing a hand over mine to garner my attention, her eyes softening as I gave her a weak smile.
“Just be my sister.”
“Now that, I can absolutely do! Come on, help me decide on an aesthetic for the new house since you’ve always had the best taste in furniture.”
I rolled my eyes with a light laugh as we both stood from the table and headed down the street towards Daylilies, a new, trendy furniture store that had just recently opened its doors to the public.
