Page 60 of Oath of Betrayal
‘You are so much more than that. This is the last time I’ll refuse you, but we will have to plan your outings carefully. As much as I know you can hold your own, you are also a target, and that means the days of carelessly traipsing over the mountains are gone,’ Orm insisted, and despite the goosebumps he caused, I turned around and jerked from his grasp.
‘Why? Because you said so?’
‘Yes, because I said so. Fuck, Ani, I understand. I don’t want to do this to you, but letting you come is not a risk I’m willing to take. It doesn’t matter how I feel; it never has. I’m your lord commander, and you will listen when I issue an order.’ He clenched his fists.
Oh, you motherfucker. I’ll show you, ‘Lord Commander,’I raged internally, ready to tell him exactly what I thought about his orders when Vahin’s voice in my head interrupted me.
‘Please, Little Flame, stop. I know you are angry, but his men are watching. Don’t undermine his authority in front of them.’
I looked past Orm, noticing the small crowd staring at us with interest. Vahin was right. I didn’t want to undermine Orm by quarrelling with him like a fishwife. I just wanted him to see my point. I had to yield this time, but if he thought he’d won, he wassorely mistaken. I took a deep breath and exhaled until I was sure I could speak without anger.
‘Of course, Lord Commander. As always, I am at your service. Please excuse me. Before you set off on patrol without me, however, I would like to request that you stay away from my quarters in future. I’m afraid you will find a less than cordial welcome.’ I bowed to complete the effect.
Orm’s face hardened into an unreadable expression. ‘You don’t mean that …’ He reached out for me, swallowing hard, but I stepped away, leaving his hand empty in the air. I wanted to be a source of comfort to him, a person he could rely on and trust, just as Alaric was. I wanted him to see me for who I was: a battle mage, not a child he had to protect and watch over as I slept.
‘Yes, Lord Commander, I do. Now, do you have any more orders, or am I free to go?’ I asked dispassionately. His hand slowly lowered, but the muscles on his jawline ticked rhythmically as he ground his teeth. ‘You are free to go, my lady. I am sorry for disturbing your nights’ rest.’
‘That was cruel, Little Flame,’I heard Vahin’s thoughts when I reached the castle.‘Orm comes to you because seeing you sleep calms his mind. He lives to serve, and you just took away the only indulgence he’s ever allowed himself.’
‘What about me, Vahin?’I looked up, seeing the dragons rise into the sky.‘I’m not trying to be cruel, but I’m suffocating, and I don’t want him to—no, I won’tlethim lock me in a tower like some fae princess,’I screamed the thought, then, in sheer frustration, shielded myself from the dragon’s mind.
As soon as Orm’s squadron disappeared into the clouds, I marched straight to the garrison’s stable. ‘I need a horse and tack,’ I demanded from the stable master, and the poor man paled under my stare.
‘I can’t, my lady. Yesterday when you said … the commander …’ he stuttered, lowering his gaze.
I didn’t know what angered me more: that Orm had thought to order his men to withhold resources in case I wanted to leave, or his soldiers’ blind obedience. ‘The commander can kiss my rosy … dragon. Will you give me the horse or not?’ I asked sharply. The man seemed to fold in on himself but refused to budge.
‘My lady, please.’
I can force his submission. I can burn this entire shithole down, knock it down with a tempest, or destroy its foundations with an earthquake. Once I’d run through enough methods of destruction, I calmed down enough to think.
I was proud of myself; ten years ago, I would have just barged through, using my magic to get what I wanted—but I’d learned to target my anger at those who deserved it. I couldn’t blame the stable master for following orders, even if those orders made my life difficult. ‘Fine, I’ll do without,’ I said, turning around to storm off.
I went straight to my room. I was already dressed for travelling but now needed some supplies. I hadn’t taken my falchion when I thought I’d be flying with Vahin, but I would need it if I’d be wandering alone. Together with a few healing potions—just in case my luck turned bad—I grabbed a bedroll and the food Agnes had laid out for me.
I was ready to go but slowed as guilt niggled at my senses. I would be in the mountains for at least two days, and I knew two men and a dragon who wouldn’t appreciate my sudden absence. For a moment, I toyed with the idea of just letting them worry, but in the end, I decided to be a grown-up. Despite ourargument, Orm didn’t deserve the worry of thinking someone had kidnapped me.
I put quill to parchment and scribbled a letter.
That should sort out the impasse we had reached. Two days should be enough to prove to Orm that there is no bogeyman trying to kill me, and after I returned, we could move on from the subject. I sealed the letter and pushed it under Orm’s office door before heading to the fortress gates. I caught several covert glances as I walked through the town square, but no one dared to stop me.
‘Does Lord Erenhart know you’re going out hunting?’ asked a familiar voice behind me, and I turned around, smiling at my friend. Katja looked at me with a raised eyebrow, waiting for an answer.
‘What do you think?’ I didn’t bother to mask the sarcasm in my voice, and my friend shook her head.
‘He won’t be happy. Everybody knows our oh-so-illustrious commander and his dark mage are chasing after you like a pair of dogs in heat. They’d never let you go alone. So, little missNivale, how are you going to deal with his temper when you return?’
‘I’ll send for some of your calming tinctures,’ I deadpanned, and she burst into laughter. ‘If I’m capable of drugging you, I suppose it wouldn’t be a problem doing the same to him, but you have to promise me one thing.’
‘Oh …?’
‘Be careful, Ani. I quite like you the way you are. I’d hate to think what state you’ll be in if the necromancer has to put you back together again.’
‘Really, Katja. It’s like you don’t know me at all. When have I not been careful?’ I asked, rolling my eyes.
‘Oh, I don’t know, maybe the time you got yourself stranded with an injured leg after chasing a bloody weregoat? Or the time you ended up puking all over the mayor’s shoes after that undead water demon—the utopiec—bashed your head in while you were chasing him through the muddy river? Should I continue?’
I felt my cheeks burning, my face bright red, but that was Katja the Merciless, whose honesty took no prisoners. ‘I’ll be back soon,’ I swore. She pulled me in for a quick hug,
