Page 66 of Collin: Episodes 4-6
“That’s more than nine hours on a weekend.”
“Yes, sir.” Damian’s voice sounded heavy.
“I admire your drive, Damian. It’s commendable. And valuable. What else have you done today?”
“Nothing, sir.”
“Nothing? Did you order yourself food? Make coffee? Care for yourself?”
Damian was quiet and then replied softly, “Collin did that, sir.”
Collin drew his arms in toward his belly and huddled. If he tightened the muscles near his ears, he could make them fill with white static. If only it would be loud enough that he could float away on it and not have to be here.
But Mr. Reevesworth had more questions for Damian. “All your food and drink or just part?”
“All, sir.”
“Did you assign him the task of caring for your basic needs?”
“No, sir.”
“Why did he do so, then?”
“I think he noticed that I was stressed, sir, and realized that I had not done so.”
Please just let this be a bad dream.
“Indeed. I think it was obvious to all of us that you were stressed. Why did you not care for yourself? Did Collin offer to be responsible for you today previously?”
“No, sir. He just appeared and took care of things.”
“Why did you allow this situation with this client to become so all-encompassing, Damian? You know that you are more important than a deal.”
Damian made a sound of frustration and chagrin, something between an unhappy moan and a groan. “I let it get away from me, sir. They were stressed out, and I…I matched their energy, sir. I felt like I had to take it as importantly as they were.”
“You could have told them that you were not available. You could have taken down their concerns and told them you were working on the issue and given them a return date. You could have informed them that you would be assigning hours to their issues and would have a follow-up for them. You could have said any number of things that would have allowed them to feel catered to and valued and still held your boundaries.”
“Yes, sir.”
“You’re important to me, Damian. You should be important to yourself.”
“I am, sir.”
“But you allowed someone to simply use you today even though I know you had plans. You didn’t even look after your basic needs. You treated yourself worse than one of those draft horses on the lakefront carriage rides. Even they have mandatory breaks and water stops.”
“Yes, sir.”
“You did not earn the client’s respect today, Damian. You taught them that they could trample on your time lightly, at their emotional whim, as long as they can pay the bill.”
Damian heaved a miserable gust of air from his lungs. “I messed up, sir. I crossed my own boundaries and allowed others to do so.”
“You did. And because you allowed others to use and abuse you, because you were in a state of being abused and used, Collin also assessed the situation as serious enough to abuse himself.”
“Sir?” Horror colored Damian’s exclamation.
“Collin assessed each of us, myself, Émeric, and you, as all having much more serious problems than the one he encountered today. You were not even getting water, let alone grabbing a snack from the kitchen. And therefore, he did not believe he could approach you.”
“He can always approach me!”
