Page 33 of Shelter for Shay
Shay laughed, but her stomach still fluttered with unease. She needed to stop thinking about all this. She was making herself nuts. Things were too new to go down that rabbit hole. “Did you read the paper this morning?” she asked, needing to redirect her thoughts.
“No, but I saw the news, and it’s going to be nonstop about the murder until the trial,” Becca said. “A real flipping media circus.”
The last thing Shay wanted to contend with was being on a murder trial jury. Hell, Shay never wanted to serve on a jury, ever. Sure, she understood it was her civic duty and all that. But the idea that someone’s freedom, or lack thereof, could be in her hands made her more than skittish. That kind of responsibility was for someone else.
“I can’t believe they’re holding the trial right here in our little town,” Shay said, watching Becca’s son gleefully fling mulch like confetti.
“I heard the defense tried to get it moved, fearful that they wouldn’t get a fair trial and all that,” Becca said. “But the judge denied it.”
Shay sipped her coffee. “My summons lines up almost exactly with the start of jury selection. What do you think the odds are that I’d get picked for something like that?”
“Terrifyingly high,” Becca replied. “You’ve got that reliable citizen vibe. You scream ‘reasonable and impartial.’ It’s annoying.”
Shay gave a wry smile. “I wish I could get out of it, but I did that a year ago. I don’t think I can do it a second time.”
Becca snorted. “You just buried your mom. Maybe if you ask for special circumstances, they will give you some grace. It can’t hurt to ask.”
Shay tried to laugh again but it came out soft and flat. “Honestly? I’m not sure I have the bandwidth for this. But at the same time, I kind of want to see it through. Not the case but do my duty. Serve my time. I mean, most people call the number and get dismissed.”
“I hate to break it to you, but with your luck these days, you’ll get?—”
“That’s just not nice.”
Becca turned to her, eyebrows raised. “I’m just being realistic.” She waved her hand. “Check the paperwork. It’s possible you’ve missed the deadline to ask for an out, but you should check just in case.”
“Moose looked. I’ve missed it.”
Becca tilted her head, staring at her. “You’ve changed, you know.”
“How so?”
“You’ve always been strong. But now it’s like… you’re allowing yourself to be. However, it’s more than that. It’s like now you’re opening yourself and letting someone in. I’ve neverseen you do that. I’ve never seen you really be yourself with a man.”
Shay rolled her eyes, but she couldn’t stop the smile that crept in. “Subtle, Becca.”
“I try.” She smiled. “But seriously, what’s really going on with you and this guy? Because it doesn’t feel casual. It feels real. Deep.”
“I don’t know. It’s so fast and intense.” Shay watched the kids for a moment. No matter how hard she tried, everything always circled back to Moose. “We talk every day. We have amazing conversations. He makes me laugh and I can just be with him, but it’s hard and now he’s being deployed in two days and that scares me. It’s like I’m afraid he might up and vanish on me.”
“I have three questions.” Becca’s smile faded into something softer. “For how long? And are you worried about his safety? Or is it bringing up all those fears of your dad and how he slipped away in the middle of the night, never to be heard from again?”
Damn, that was way too observant, and Shay had to admit, her best friend hit a nerve.
“He thinks just a week,” Shay said. “He told me he’d try to call, but it might not be possible.”
Becca reached for her iced latte like she needed both hands to brace herself. “And the rest of my questions?”
“I’ll admit I’ve been thinking a lot about my dad lately,” Shay confessed. “I have one old photograph my mom gave me of him years ago, and a name. But that’s all I have. My mom never wanted to talk about him and because I loved her and she was such a great mom, I never pushed too hard. But I’ve started going through her things and I can’t find anything that was his. Nothing that shows they had two years together. No wedding pictures, no marriage license. And my mom kept everything. The woman was a bit of a pack rat.”
“Those things might have been too painful to keep,” Becca said. “He did break her heart. Over the years, the only men your mother ever dated were the guys we tried to fix her up with and they never lasted. A few dinners and that was it. She was a little broken from that experience and you, my friend, have always had commitment issues because of it.”
“I have not,” Shay scoffed.
“Oh really.” Becca slurped on her drink before waving it around like a wild woman. “I swear, half the time you packed up and moved to a different country was because some man got a little too close for comfort. Not to mention, you often picked guys who were players. The kind of dudes who, after a month or two, would get bored anyway.”
Shay narrowed her stare. “Wow. I can’t believe you said that. You’re painting me to be a shallow person who uses people.”
“That’s not what I’m saying.” Becca shook her head. “I might have been leery of Moose at first. But Todd and I spent a little time with him the week he was here, and he seems solid. He was attentive and always looking out for your needs. He stood by your side. He didn’t have to stay for the funeral. He could have come, visited with your mom, and bugged out. But he didn’t. He saw it through.”
