Page 4 of Pick Me
He rolled his eyes. “Who’s there?”
“Interrupting homicidal cow.”
Knox scowled. “Wha—?”
“Moooooo, motherfucker! Now, stop interrupting me before I shank you. Ahem.”
Knox’s mouth dropped open in disbelief. God, I was good at making him insane, and God, I enjoyed it. There was nothing as satisfying as having your talents and your passions overlap, was there?
“Where was I? Oh, right. Sopiemade me think of your Uncle Drew and how he said at breakfast that he was going to the market today for the last summer plums to make a plum ginger tart—which isnota pie, but is pie-adjacent, and sounds fucking life-changing—”
“Pie-adjacent is not a word.” Knox rubbed both hands over his face tiredly. “And your mind scares the shit out of me. Look, I am trying to have a simple conversation in which I explain—”
“Butthatmade me remember that Drew also said he’d pick up the last of the summer sweet corn,” I went on blithely. “Andthatsort of distracted me because I don’t think I ever noticed that corn had a season before. I mean, strawberries, sure. We have a strawberry festival not too far from my hometown in Florida, and literally everyone in the world loves it—” I broke off to inspect Knox’s scowly face for a second and wrinkled my nose. “I mean,youmight not.”
Knox shook his head like he wasn’t sure what he’d done to deserve this fate.
I’d have happily reminded him.
“But then thinking of corn made my stomach growl, and I remembered your sister said she was making turkey burgers with the butterkase cheese that Mr…. uh…” I closed my eyes and snapped my fingers. “Your neighbor with the mustache who makes the cheese?”
“Norm Avery,” he bit out, like it pissed him off to answer my question but he couldn’t help himself, ’cause he was a know-it-all like that.
“Right! Yes. Him.” I popped my eyes open. “I remembered Emma’s making turkey burgers with the butterkase Mr. Avery brings, and then my stomach growled, and I felt a little faint, and I thought how sad it would be if I died of starvation before I ate one last meal, and I resolved to keep myself alive just for the butterkase.” I shrugged again, inviting him to see reason. “And so, you see, I couldn’t actually pay attention to your talky talk.”
Knox stared at me for a beat, like he couldn’t quite believe I was a real human. Then he tipped his head back so he could speak to the rafters.
“Is this guy some sort of punishment, Lord?” he demanded. “An eleventh plague? Because, I have to ask… why not locusts? Locusts are a classic.”
Despite the insult, I had to bite my cheek to keep from smiling, which was another thing that was extremely unfair. No one who irrationally disliked me was allowed to have that dry, quirky, seriously appealing sense of humor, damn it! But Knox’s all-day conversations with God—which were the opposite of prayerful—made it hard to remember that.
“I’m way cuter than a plague of locusts.” I smiled and batted my eyelashes winningly.
Knox stared at me again. “You’re perpetually hungry, selectively hard of hearing, and incapable of rinsing a coffee mug and putting it directly in the dishwasher, even though that’s by far the most efficient way to do things.”
I peered at him over the table and nodded solemnly. “What I hear you saying is that you think I’m cute,” I lied.
A flush hit Knox’s cheekbones, and my gut tightened. Annoyance looked good on him, damn it. This meant that torturing him resulted in me torturing myself, andthatwas the most unfair thing of all.
Knox opened his mouth to retort and then shut it again. “Some of us still have work to do, Goodman,” he muttered after a beat.
* * *
“Emma saysdinner, you guys!” Aiden Sunday announced, throwing open the office door hard enough to bang against the wall behind it. “And,” he added with seven-year-old solemnity, “she said to tell Gage there’s baked beans.”
“Oooh.” I let my sandaled feet fall from the desk to the floor with a slap and resolved not to think about Kno—anyoneanymore. “Baked beans sound good.”
Aiden’s smile turned crafty. “I maybe ate some because I’m Emma’s taste tester, and they’rereallygood. She makes them with maple syrup.”
“Then I’d better go get some before you gobble them all up, huh?” I grinned as I pushed myself to my feet, then groaned and slapped a hand on the desk to steady myself when my back twinged.
“Y’okay, Gage?” Aiden demanded.
Knox snorted. “Old age stalks him.”
I wanted very desperately to flip the man off, but I couldn’t in front of Aiden. Webb seemed like a cool guy, but I didn’t think he’d enjoy me teaching his kid bad manners.
“I’m fine. Supremely youthful. Just sore from sitting still too long.” I ignored Knox and directed my remark to Aiden as I stretched my arms to the ceiling so far my hoodie rode up before bending over to touch the floor. “I need to get back to working out. Maybe get some fresh air.” I was way too young to be falling apart.
