Page 10 of Hand Picked
“… so already it had a legendary past,” Van was saying. “But the bugle truly became symbolic when Barnaby Sunday fell in love with Moriah Pond, the most beautiful girl in the Hollow. Her father wouldn’t consent to the marriage, because Barnaby was but a lowly sheepherder with only a small parcel of land—”
My attention was caught momentarily. “People who like sheep areweird,” I pronounced.
And that was just a known fact, which had nothing to do with Luke Williams and his sheep, since I was very much not thinking about Luke Williams anymore, and especially not tonight.
I held out my glass for a refill.
“Yeah. Okay.” Van filled it up. “Anyway, as I was saying, these star-crossed lovers were doomed by Moriah’s father, who didn’t trust Barnaby’s motives for getting married and wanted to protect his daughter. The entire town’s loyalty was divided. But there was a kindly preacher in town who wanted to help. He gave them the bugle—”
I darted another covert glance at the woman and caught her looking back at me. She seemed interested, but I had no idea what to do with that. Did she want me to make a move? And did that mean sending her a drink or something? Was that what people did? It all seemed like so much damneffort.
And I could imagine my siblings’ old-age comments if they ever heard me say that.
I had never been more aware of the fact that nearly all my dating experience prior to this had been with Amanda, who I’d known since we were in elementary school. Things between us had just sort of… happened when we were in our twenties. And then kept happening.
“—and so, on account of the Unity Bugle, the law was handed down that two people who’d pledged their troth on the town green and proven their commitment to one another would be joined, no matter who had somethin’ bad to say about it. Peace and unity were restored to the town. Moriah and Barnaby lived happily ever after. And the spirit of goodwill, good fortune, and good friendship remains in the bugle to this very day!” Van sniffed and wiped his cheek with the back of his hand.
“Uh.” I peered at him. “Are you okay?”
“Yes. Fine,” he choked. “It’s just so beautiful, you know? The bugle story. Like a fairy tale.”
“Right. Sure. So… question.” I cleared my throat. “In your expert opinion, what’s the best way to pick someone up at a bar?”
“Pick someone… Were you even listening?” Van huffed.
“Obviously. I heard every word,” I lied. “It’s about… unity. And… friendship.”
Van appeared mollified. “Well, then. To answer your question, I’d say you buy a drink for the lady orlad… you have your eye on.”
I raised an eyebrow. My brothers Knox, Porter, and Hawk were all gay, so folks figured I was, too, deep down, especially after Amanda and I divorced.
They kept providing me supportive opportunities to come out, which was sweet, in an ass-backwards way, and also excruciating. I felt like I constantly had to prove my straightness.
“Van, if I had my eye on a lad, I wouldn’t keep it a secret,” I informed him. “So you buy the drink… and then what?”
“And then… I dunno.” Van scratched his chin thoughtfully. “What do you want to have happen from there? You looking for a fun night or something permanent?”
The reality of my situation crashed down on me like a bucket of cold water.
I was not a hookup guy. I never had been.
But I was also not a relationship guy. Not anymore.
And I couldn’t imagine navigating the boundaries of a casual in-between thing, when I was already focused on Aiden’s custody, and running my business, and taking care of my brothers and sister, and winning the Cold War with Luke Williams, who was trying to annex my fucking orchard like fucking Napoleon.
“Whoa,” Van said. “You looked murder-y for a second there.”
Probably because I was.
“Never mind,” I told Van, grinding my teeth. Then I shook my empty glass. “Just keep ’em coming, okay?”
I watched the hockey for an entire period, sucking down more Rusty Spikes and ignoring Van’s concerned eyeballs while the alcohol spread out from my stomach to all of my limbs in hot little tendrils. It wasn’t unpleasant at all… but it also wasn’t as distracting as I’d hoped, because now that Luke Williams was in my brain, every sip of my drink just seemed to cement his presence there.
Knox was super wrong, I realized. The last thing I needed was toavoidthe man—I’d been trying to do that for months, and it hadn’t worked. No, what I needed to do was confront him. Look into his weird, big eyes and tell him that I was not fooled by his pretty smile—
Pretty?
I scowled at the television.Jesus fuck,Luke Williams was literally making me lose my mind.
