Page 82 of Caller of Crows
Letting himself fall back on the bed, he stared up at the ceiling.
The crow on the pillow next to him cocked its head and studied him with its black eyes. It let out a caw, and Sven couldn't help but wonder if maybe it was trying to comfort him in the only way it could.
He smiled weakly and stroked his hand gently down its feathers, thinking about everything that was on his mind. "What would you choose?" he asked softly, and then he shook his head. Talking to birds.
Maybe he'd already spent too much time down here.
Forcing himself to focus back on his task, he took a deep, fortifying breath and picked up his phone again. There were still things he needed to arrange, so many things to think of.
It wasn't until noon that the door to the bedroom opened and Altair came in, looking exhausted, and no wonder. Sven had expected him to turn in hours ago. He'd seemed tired at the club earlier, and it was way past the vampire's bedtime now.
"Hungry?" Altair asked.
Sven shook his head, gesturing to the half-eaten plate of food that another vampire had brought by earlier. Sven had eaten some of it, more out of habit than actual hunger. "I ate already."
"Good." Altair sat down on the bed and glanced at the crow, who hopped onto his shoulder without prompting. He scratched its head absentmindedly. "Did you get everything done?"
Sven nodded. "As much as possible." He paused, hesitant to speak, but then decided that he'd rather take the plunge and get it over with. "The service will be at 2 pm at the cemetery near the church by my house."
Altair didn't react in any visible way.
Sven bit his lip. Fuck, why did he need permission to leave here? Cale was right and this was ridiculous. "I'm going there," he said.
Altair finally glanced at him and Sven's stomach turned at the frown on his face. "That's not safe."
"Alt, I have to do this." Sven steeled himself for the inevitable argument.
Altair didn't seem to be in the mood, though. The vampire merely sighed. "I told you I would think about it."
"Well, have you?" Sven asked impatiently. He understood that Altair was worried about his safety, but this was his mother's funeral and it was important. It wasn't up for discussion.
Altair looked at him, and Sven saw the weariness in his eyes, the tension in the vampire's shoulders. For a moment there, he felt as if he could read the vampire's thoughts as easily as Altair could read his. The look in the immortal's eyes spoke volumes of his pain and uncertainty… and the fear that he couldn't express out loud.
The vampire wasscared, and that gave Sven pause.
How could this stubborn, determined, strong creature be afraid? What could possibly scare the Caller of Crows?
The idea of losinghim?
Altair reached out slowly, hesitantly, brushing his fingertips against Sven's cheek as if he didn't know how his touch would be received. "I can't risk you."
Sven held himself very still, uncertain. Uncertainty seemed to have become his new normal in these recent days, and it irked him. He didn't want to feel unsure. About his future, about where he belonged.
He wanted to be free and to know he was making the right choice, but how could he when everything had grown so damn complicated?
"You mean too much to me," Altair added quietly.
Sven met his gaze and his breath stuttered. There was so much he didn't know about this man sitting in front of him.
And so much he desperately wanted to.
Sven put his phone away and placed his hand over Altair's larger one. "Let's not fight tonight," he suggested because his heart ached from everything he'd already been through, and he knew that having this conversation with Altair, too, would simply cause him more pain.
"It's not night." Altair smiled faintly. "You're getting used to a vampire's schedule."
"Yeah, I guess I am. Weird, huh?"
"No." The crow fluttered away as Altair slid his arm around Sven's waist and tugged him closer, and Sven went, craving the closeness between them, the reassurance. "I think you were always meant to become mine," the vampire murmured, his voice a dark caress on Sven's ear. His breath stirred Sven's hair and sent goosebumps down Sven's spine as Altair added: "Mine alone."
