Page 49 of Knox
"I’m thinking back to every embarassing moment in my life."
Adrian rubbed the back of his neck. Suddenly he felt like a voyeur for having read Knox’s story so many times. For having dissected it online. "You don’t have to be ashamed of anything."
"You’re probably right." Knox turned to Adrian again, a curious look on his features. "So you know everything I’ve done and you know about everything I like to do in detail."
"I guess you could say that." Adrian’s face warmed.
"And when you read my story, and you read about nights like the one I’ve shared with that warlock… Do you imagine yourself in the warlock’s place?"
Adrian swallowed. The way Knox looked at him, he found it difficult to breathe. "I…" he stammered, trying to find his footing. "Maybe? Sometimes?" His voice came out softer than intended.
He wanted to be brave and assertive and sexy, but he wasn’t. In reality, he was just a little nerd with glasses who spent too muchtime reading books and too little time dealing with people in the real world.
Now that his book-world was colliding with the real world, he didn’t know how to handle himself.
But Knox’s lips curved into a smile, anyway. "Sometimes?" He stepped closer, and Adrian forced himself to remain in place. He could feel the heat radiating from Knox’s body. The incubus smelled like the air did before a thunderstorm.
"Sometimes," Adrian confirmed. "But… I don’t… I mean… It’s just a fantasy." Fantasizing about something didn’t necessarily mean you wanted that thing to happen in real life, did it?
Adrian totally wanted to fuck Knox, but he wasn’t sure he wanted Knox to do to him what he’d done to the warlock. He didn’t enjoy the same things.
He only wished he did.
"What do you like about this fantasy?" Knox asked as if he could sense the hesitation in Adrian. "Keep in mind, you are not my enemy." Knox cupped his cheek. "I would not treat you the same way. Not unless you asked me to."
Adrian took a deep breath. "I’ll tell you," he began, his voice steadying, "but only if you tell me what you want from me first."
Knox stepped back, a hint of confusion on his face. "What I want?"
"Is all of this just so you can fight the Shadow King?" Adrian needed to have the facts sorted in his mind so he didn’t get any silly ideas that would only hurt him in the end. If he was nothing but a tool to Knox, he could live with that, but he wanted the matter to be clear from the start.
To his surprise, the question seemed to be difficult for Knox to respond to. The demon had to give it some actual thought. "I have to beat Caelen," he said in the end, "and you can give me the magic I require to do so. I won’t try to deny that."
Adrian nodded even as his stupid delusional heart was sinking.
But it seemed Knox wasn’t done talking. "You’re the only one who can help me," he said. "All the other humans in this world feel lifeless to me. They might as well be dead husks, but not you."
Adrian didn’t know how to feel about that. On one hand, he was flattered. On the other, it felt like Knox was saying he had no other choice. "So, you’re coming on to me because I’m your only option?"
Knox’s features softened. "No, Adrian. I’m coming on to you because you are special. You resonate with me in a way that no one else does. The important part isn’t that you’re my only choice. It’s that you’re therightchoice."
Adrian searched Knox’s eyes, looking for any sign of deception. But all he saw was sincerity, a raw honesty that left him without words.
How the hell was he supposed to respond to lines like that?
He was an editor by trade and a blogger by choice. He knew words—lots of them!—and yet he could not get any of them to pass his lips.
What was Knox saying when he said that Adrian was special?
As Adrian stared at the incubus, trying to process the jumble of thoughts in his head, the truth slowly revealed itself to him.Knox was only saying that because he didn’t know. Because Adrian hadn’t told him yet.
"I don’t like anal," he blurted out.
Knox blinked at him.
Adrian hated himself.
Why did he have to say it like that and ruin the moment?
