Page 145 of Goodbye Again
“Excuse me. We’ll catch up?” he asks, and I nod, ready to run away.
“Sure. Congratulations again, JP. I’m so proud of you,” I say, letting the crowd swallow me as I back away.
I think of how the last time we were together, I asked him to forget me. I think of how he’s held onto that promise, and sohave I. Even when it’s been hard. Even when it’s been the middle of the day or the dead of night, how I’ve resisted every urge to call him. Then I think of yesterday and how I found his note and gave in, calling him only to hear his voicemail click on. It would seem the universe is against our fate as well.
But mostly, I think of how happy I am to see him thriving, living his very best life, accomplishing every dream he’s ever mentioned in passing.
Later, I make my way to the courtyard outside of the banquet hall and watch the lights of the city reflect in my champagne. Mom is networking and Ellie and Sofia approached me twenty minutes ago to say goodbye. I assume JP went with them. I don’t blame him for not saying goodbye. We’re strangers again, reminding me it’s possible to know people once and never again.
I throw back the last of my champagne and startle when someone clears their throat behind me. I whirl around to face him.My JP.
“I figured you left already,” I say, standing and smoothing out my dress.
“Haven’t been able to escape the crowd to find you.”
I swallow hard. “Yes, you’re very popular these days.”
He chuckles, his gaze bouncing off the concrete and back to me. “I’ve needed you, Jules.”
The admission steals my breath and makes my jaw tremble. “I got to chapter forty-two.”
His eyes question me for a moment, jaw pulsing, then realization strikes him. “Did you find apricity?”
I shake my head. “I don’t think I can without you, JP.”
He steps even closer, and for some reason, he seems bolder, stronger, more consuming than I’ve ever known his gentle spirit to be. “Tell me everything, Jules,” he practically commands.
“What do you mean?” I ask.
“I mean, I want to know what color you painted your front door. I want to know if you added a tire swing to the big oak tree. I want to know what kind of car you drive now and what song you play on repeat when you go for a run. Tell me everything, Jules. Because I can’t stop wondering about you.”
My chest rises and falls heavily as I contemplate how to broach even a portion of what he just said.
“I thought I told you to forget about me.”
“I thought I said I’d try.”
I press my lips hard together. “You know where this ends up for us. Every time. Let’s not pretend this time will be different.”
“Are you with someone?” he asks.
My chin snaps back. “No, why?”
“Neither am I.”
I shake my head to gather myself. “That wasn’t our only issue, JP.”
He steps closer and the air echoes with heat the closer he gets to me, making my heart pound. “The more time goes by, the more I realize our issues weren’t issues. They were just circumstances.”
I nod, breathing deeply. “You’re acting like you want to jump into a long distance relationship when you haven’t seen me in over a year.” I let out a preposterous laugh. “JP, you don’t even know if you like me anymore.”
“I never did like you,” he says. Another step closer. Another breath I don’t take. “I loved you the moment we met.”
“JP...” I inch back, my feelings for him always drowning out my logic.
“You are the warmth of the sun in winter, Jules. There’s no other way to describe you.” He eats up the inches with his words. “You will have many loves, Jules.”
“You will have just one,” I whisper.
