Page 19 of Play Dirty
My dress is too tight.
And my will to place the mask and play my role is non-existent.
Still, I persevere.
Daddy would expect me to, I couldn’t disappoint my family. I’m an only child. Fuck, I ate my twin in the womb—the true Johnson heir. The boy my father always wanted but never got. Unlike the rest of the elite, my father is new money. He was long established before I came along, but my mother’s side is the real royalty. Dad lucked out while playing soccer in this very school and met my mother. Somehow, he also managed to convince Gustavo Belazar to allow him to marry his precious daughter. Dad calls it fate.
I call it charm.
Looking over at the large ivory clock sitting on the wall between the grandmaster stairs, I focus on the little hand as it slowlymoves; no amount of champagne can drown the small voice in the back of my head that’s worried for June. It’s so unlike her.
“Shiloh.” A familiar feminine voice rings from my left, my hand cups the long glass base of the flute, and with a smile, I turn. “Katie, nice to see you.”
The redhead dressed in a black tight dress hugs me, “I missed you so much. How was Rome?”
I smile, trying to will away the memories that resurface. “Oh, you know how it is. Nothing but sightseeing and shopping.”
She pulls away, finally, scanning me with her brown eyes. “Sounds like a delightful time, it’s amazing what you did tonight.” Katie motions towards the room. “This is incredible, every year is better than the last.”
“I can’t take all the credit. After all, I only paid for it.” Katie chuckles, taking a sip of bubbly. “The petals seem promising this year. They will be excited to create the match-up.”
My stomach knots. It’s always uncomfortable to talk about women as if they are cattle. Even in our situation. It just feels so wrong.
So twisted.
“Yes, they will.”
She hums in agreement- her gaze drifting where the petals stand. All the freshman girls line up in uniform, something straight out ofThe Handmaidens. Allison stands at the end of it— as their handler. Hands clasp before them, dressed in white for purity, as the donors drink and smoke cigars around them. Scrutinizing their cattle before their purchase. Our matchups are about power moves. Which pairing will lock in the most power or the most strategic move? The elites are always playing checkers while the rest remain oblivious.
Thankfully, the amount of alcohol I’ve been consuming since arriving is beginning to take hold, and finally, I can run away. “Do we know when the pairings will take place?” Katie shakes her head — a firm no.
“What we do know is that Mr. Johnson has been over at the Santorellis' house talking about your engagement with Asher.”
“It’s going,” I reply with a small curl of my lips. Dad, right now is trying to execute a power move by marrying us off, hoping to end a feud between the two top universities that has been going on for years. Maybe I can ask him to negotiate a term where Asher isn’t fucking everything that looks his way.
“That’s wonderful. I saw him with Xavier and thought it was strange. Didn’t think that they knew each other.”
Just hearing his name causes my blood to run cold, my arms instinctively wrap around me as if I could shield myself from the terror his name wreaks through my body. People say that the body learns to keep a score of your trauma. At this point, consider me his fiddle. “Hey, you okay?” Katie’s voice lulls me from the edge of disappearing, bringing me out of the depths of hell to only smack me into another.
“Yeah, I’m okay, just wondering where June is. That’s all.” I reply by rubbing my wrist.
“Ah, Morelli?” The gleam in her eyes shows me— she knows exactly who I’m referencing. However, it’s the same reason why I want to scream. Before she can continue to ruin the small buzz I have going, I dismiss myself with a smile and disappear into the crowd. Contrary to what people think, I am very much antisocial— I hate big lavish parties. Being around too many people drains me. I prefer being comfortable, eating some take out or hiding in the art studio, getting down and dirty with some clay as music softly plays in the background.
I only have two friends, one I've known since childhood, June, and a friend we made along the way, Tatiana. June is the friend I can be comfortable at home with, and Tatiana fuels my fire— we are all so different, but we work.
Tension coils up my neck as I notice the time.
I can’t be late again…
One thing that was drilled into me during summer break is the importance of being on time and ready to please.
No matter what.
The clock is moving closer to midnight— I can't be late, but I also can’t be seen. He couldn’t be seen, only felt. Unfortunately for me.
One of the only upsides of being married to Asher is that maybe then this part will be over. I would finally be free of this prison, trading it for another one with golden bars. The bubbles tickle the back of my throat as I chug down the rest of my drink. From the bar, I catch sight of the donors devouring the girls with their gaze; not even the masks could hide the depravity in them. Turning to the bartender, I hold up my index finger and giggle when a burp escapes as I open my mouth.
“One whiskey on the rocks.”
