And discard me.
Like everyone else in my life.
I’m nothing but a secret. A fantasy.
Something that feels good in the dark until the light shines in, ruining the dream. I chug down my champagne in one sip. Looking around, I try to find him…
Nico.
But all the masks are the same, the dim light makes it even harder, and I’m not going to lie, the alcohol has started to invade my system. The girls whisper amongst themselves, making me feel out of place. I look down the line of light pink satin dresses, finding Tati, who smiles at me warmly and motions me to the bathroom. I make sure no one notices as I follow her through the crowd. When I step inside, she’s in a stall, and some girls talk amongst themselves.
“My heart is beating so fast.” One of the new girls says, placing a hand on her chest. The other girl fixes her glossy lipstick, “Do you think only the seniors are participating? Or do we get some of the soccer players too?”
“I think so.” The blonde one answers.
“That’s good, maybe I can get the dead girl's boyfriend to find comfort inside me.” She purrs, her eyes locking with mine in the mirror. For a moment, I picture myself slamming her face into the mirror, but that would blow my cover, so instead I keep moving.
My stomach sinks to see how accepting of their fates they are. How willing they are to just be fucked and discarded... I guess it’s what happens when you’re groomed your entire life to be the perfect obedient wife. Tonight, they officially become the selected few who will eventually end up in an arranged marriage. Villalargos, alongside the donors, use the hunt to create business partnerships, mark their claim, and create powerhouse couples.
Costa Mar students aren’t welcome… Which means Asher would never be allowed to be part of the hunt. My relationship with him was formed due to my own brattiness. My own desire to have something that was mine. Dad only agreed because of who Asher is and what it would mean for us to be married.
Power.
A Johnson and a Santorelli. Old money meets new money.
Tati opens the stall, motioning for me to step inside. “I heard something interesting while getting ready.” She whispers as I look over my shoulder, waiting for the chatty pair to leave. Once we are alone, “Talk.”
“Okay, hear me out before you shut it down. But I got some weird photo and it’s of June naked.”
My brows draw together, my lips shifting to a thin line. “What?”
She pullsout her phone from inside her dress. We had to hide our phones, petals aren’t allowed to have it on them.
No phones. No recording. No proof.
Sure enough, there she is lying in bed, covering her face. Ashamed.
“Tati, what is this?”
She gives me a disbelieving look, “Obviously, June was cheating on her boyfriend, look.” She pointed at a tattoo on the side. “That’s not Nico.”
I think I’m going to be sick. My hand presses into my mouth, fighting the urge to vomit at the shock of this revelation. “If we find who this is, we can find out who took this picture.”
“So this is why we are here?”
She nods. “Honestly, I was just coming in blindly, and receiving the picture truly did help. It helps narrow down the suspects.” When the shock finally wears off, I wrap my arms around Tati. “Okay, now let’s head back with the rest. The hunt is about to start. You go first.” She shoves me softly. “We can’t be seen together, never know who’s watching. Be careful.”
The anticipation has my body going rogue. Butterflies erupt within me, my heart is beating frantically, and warmth spreads through me. My body remembers my first hunt, the smell of him as his body slammed into me. Even then, he wouldn’t look at me, and even after, I still meant nothing.
I only became his secret.
Something to fuck before he chose the better woman… before he decided to date my best friend.
“Hearing Damage,” By Thom Yorke, begins to play softly through the speakers. Reaching for another glass of pink champagne, I let the bubbles tickle the back of my throat as I finish it in one go. Placing the glass on the counter when I walk by, I take my place as we line up on the bottom of the stairs.
One of the crowned ones gives us the gold coins, with a sly smile. My hand closes around the cool metal, letting the feeling keep me grounded instead of drifting into nostalgia and need. The feeling of being watched comes over me, causing goosebumps to rise along my body. Scanning the crowd, I spot Nico.
His tall, muscular frame watches me like a predator as he swallows the rest of the amber liquid in his glass. My thighs involuntarily clench together. Will he go after me again? It's been years since we’ve done this.