Page 105 of Protected from Malice
If my heart wasn’t a puddle already, it sure is now.
And before I can stop myself, the words that have been spinning in my head for days, weeks—if I’m honest with myself, years—come spilling out.
“I love you.”
Rafe’s face jolts in surprise. “What?”
My cheeks go hot. “I know it’s not the right time. Standing here outside my work like this. But… I do. I love you. So much. It’s okay if you’re not there yet. I don’t expect you to say it back, I wasn’t planning to say it today but it just came out, and?—”
Augh. Stop babbling. Just stop.
“Anyway,” I blather on, “I mean it. I love you. Everything about you. And I know you have this idea about me needing a white knight, but it’s not true. I need you. Just?—”
Rafe silences me with a kiss.
Then he looks at me, and everything he’s feeling is right there in his eyes. “Eden.” He swallows. “I love you, too. And whatever you need, I’ll give it to you. Protection. Safety. Someone to bring you to work. To counseling. Someone to play trivia with. To cook for you. Everything you need, Eden. I want to be the man who gives it to you.”
Oh.
My nose prickles. My vision blurs. To keep myself from crying, I bury my face in his neck. Once I wrest back control of my emotions, I lean back and meet his gaze. “Everything you need, Rafe. I’ll give it to you, too.”
“Brain.” He strokes my cheek. “You already have.”
I wasa little worried being back at work would feel strange, but it’s been reassuringly normal.
Aside from the initial ‘how are you feeling’s and ‘good to see you back’s and from one lab tech who tends to talk before thinking, ‘I can’t believe someone tried to kill you! But I’m so glad you’re okay,’ I was able to settle back into my regular routine fairly quickly.
Walking back into the lab to see all the equipment ready and waiting for me, catching up with the rest of my research team, even sitting in my lumpy office chair that I can never quite manage to set at the right height… It was exactly what I needed.
Normalcy.
Feeling productive again.
Making progress towards a goal more than two decades in the making.
I don’t talk about it much—my dad’s death and how it’s pushed me to go into medical research—but it’s always there in the back of my mind. I’ll never forget watching him grow progressively sicker; watching his body fail him even though his brilliant mind was still so strong.
There had to be a way, I told myself back then.With all the advances in medicine, there had to be a way to fix him.
Two decades ago, there wasn’t.
Now? There could be, if only this drug I’ve been working on succeeds. I know it won’t bring my dad back, but if I can prevent other people from losing their loved ones, it will all be worth it.
Just a couple more weeks, and I’ll hopefully hear back about the CTA application. If it’s accepted, we move on to phase one trials. It’s not a sure thing at that point, by any means, but it’sone step closer to bringing the treatment to market. And once it’s there? Honestly, I’m not sure what’s next for me. Another disease to research? Maybe a shift to working at a university? Or?—
If I’m still with Rafe, maybe kids are an option. He’s already forty, but lots of men have kids way older than that. I know he’ll claim he wouldn’t be a good dad, but that’s patently untrue. Rafe would be a wonderful father.
Although, if we have a girl, her prospective boyfriends might not agree.
A rueful chuckle slips out before I can stifle it. Look at me, already thinking about kids with Rafe when we haven’t even talked about where he’ll be living next month.
A quick glance up and down the hallway reassures me that, fortunately, no one’s around to hear me laughing to myself. Not that I haven’t seen other people laughing or talking to themselves while they walk around the building, but still. It would be a little embarrassing.
I’m in the clear, though. The hallway leading to the employee lounge is empty, which is actually pretty surprising. Usually when I make my mid-morning trip to get a cappuccino from the vending machine, I run into at least one or two people with the same goal as me.
No, the cappuccino isn’t very good. It’s from a vending machine, after all. But it’s much quicker to head to the lounge than the coffee shop two blocks down. Plus, I promised Rafe I wouldn’t leave the building alone.
CouldI? Sure. With Gayla, Chris, and the original would-be kidnapper in jail, heading outside on my own is perfectly safe.
