Page 42 of Ruin Me Knot
I hold my breath as she finally lifts her fork, syrup trailing down the edge, and lifts the first bite to her lips. My cock jerks when her eyes flutter closed and I catch that shudder of pleasure rolling through her. I leak a little right there at the table at the sound she makes.
She chews and I feel like high-fiving Gabe when she blinks hard, eyes shining. She holds shaking fingers to her lips. "They taste just like the pancakes my mom used to make."
She guts me.
All I want is to pull her close, hold her and make sure the world can’t hurt her anymore.
She freezes, fork clattering to her plate and her gaze bounces straight to me. "Oh."
Her shoulders round and she pulls in on herself. She’s sinking back down again andhow much trauma did those assholes give her? I don’t understand what set her off, but trauma has no reason to shoot out of nowhere. I rein in the flash of rage, not at her but on her behalf. I need to catch her before she crashes again.
I lift her and pull her into my lap before she can spiral. My arms fold around her, anchoring her against my chest. The vibrations start deep in my chest, a steady purr rolling out, rumbling through both our bodies.
I catch her chin in my grip before she can shrink away. "What did you think just then? Don’t hide. Tell us what wrong thing you think you said."
I force her to hold my gaze as she twists her hands in the hem of the sweatshirt, the suffering lingering in her eyes slicing through me. I make myself bear the weight of her anguish because I can, and she’s already carried more than enough.
"Tell me, Omega. What did you say that was so wrong?"
Her voice is thin and battered when she finally speaks. "It’s against the rules to talk of home."
"And why is it against the rules?" I ask, dreading to hear the fucked-up answer they’ve made her believe. Fuck them and their fucking rules. I’ll give them rules to live by at the end of my fists when I catch up to them. Then I’ll destroy them, and their rules can die with them.
I keep my gaze locked on hers, not letting up even though it kills me to put her through this. My purr deepens, holding her steady. Giving her strength. She wavers, but her words come out stiff and unnatural. "Because we’re a vessel for our Alphas'. Our purpose is only for them. We have no home. No past. The only thing we’re good for is presenting our holes, using our bodies however our Alphas want. There’s nothing else to offer. We.Are. Nothing."
Chapter Nineteen
Leah
I’m pinned, pulse stuttering, my whole world narrowing to the heat in Alpha’s stare. I spilled poison I didn’t want to share. The words echo in my head, ugly and cold. He knows every disgusting rule, every lesson born through pain and scarred under my skin. I didn’t want to tell him. It’s ugly. Too horrible to put into words, but he asked, and I had to tell him.
He’ll use my confessions against me now. Use them to shackle me. I’ve given him a map of how to control me. Now he knows, he’ll bark at me to present. He’ll laugh and tell me I should have remembered the rules when I’m face down on the floor waiting to be used the way allOmegas are used.
I can’t stop the deep tremors shuddering through me. God, I’m stupid for thinking things could be different. The rules keep flashing in my head. The only familiar thing is the rhythm of fear and shame.
Ronan’s perfume closes in and my heart pounds loud enough to shatter me. I’m falling, falling and waiting. Waiting for his order. I curve my shoulders, shrinking. Perhaps if make myself small enough, I can cease to exist. If only life would be that kind.
"Open your mouth, Omega."
My jaw falls open because Alpha gave me an order. I can’t disobey him. I brace for the fist I know will come.
Something presses against my lips. It’s sweet. Alpha sets food in my mouth. My eyes flutter open. I hadn’t realized I’d clenched them shut. A bite of pancake rests on my tongue, warm and soaked in syrup.
"Chew, Omega." Alpha’s voice is an order I can’t deny.
My jaw works and my mouth floods with sweetness and warmth and comfort. The darkness surrounding me dims enough to filter light and sounds. Sunday mornings, pancakes on the table, laughter that belongs to another life.
"Swallow, Omega."
Another order to obey. Alpha orders me to eat again. Another mouthful. And another. The food settles warm in my stomach that’s growing full.
Light shifts around the edges of my vision. Breath moves in my lungs. The sound of the kitchen sharpens. I’m perched on Ronan’s unyielding thighs as his arm steadies around my waist, pressed against a chest hard enough to be steel.
I blink into his face, drawn into his caramel gaze that sees everything. He doesn’t look away, just keeps me steady with the determination in his eyes, the heat of his body, the power in his muscles and his thick, heady spice. I let out the breath I didn’t know I’d been holding under the gravity of his attention.
A glass appears before my mouth, the rim cool against my bottom lip. "Drink, Omega."
The first splash of orange juice shocks my tongue, sweet, cold, bright and…
