Page 70 of Ruin Me Knot
Ronan lays a jacket over my shoulders. The weight of it settles me. "What’s going on?" I ask.
Ronan’s hands linger on my shoulders. "We thought you might like to eat brunch in the garden downstairs." He pauses, letting that land. "Right now."
One moment I’m hit with a sharp, thrilling pulse of want so powerful I can taste it, and the next, nerves spike through me. This is what I’ve dreamed about for years and now it’s been offered, it’s too big and small. The world drops to one side, off kilter.
Ronan tips my chin with two thick fingers and leans down. His lips brush mine with a sudden kiss that I wish went on longer. When he pulls back, I can only stare up at him, wanting more.
"Another technique to stop you spiraling, Kitten," Ronan says.
I huff out an incredulous laugh, amazed I have it in me. "I don’t think most psychologists recommend kissing as therapy for people who are spiraling."
He smirks, cocky and unrepentant. "It worked, didn’t it?"
Gods, it did. The echo of that kiss flashes through me, scattering the nerves back into the corners where they belong. Gabriel shoves the picnic basket into Ronan’s hands with a roll of his eyes.
"My turn with our Omega," he declares. Before I can process it, he’s looping his arm around my waist just tight enough to anchor me against his body. He steers me toward the front door but stops just short.
His hazel eyes roam over my face. "Is this okay, Sweetheart? We don’t have to do this. You can pull out if it’s too much. Just say the word."
Suddenly the next step is so much bigger than I expected. I lost it when I thought I might never go outside, and now I can, I’m filled with doubt. My chest tightens, that old panic starting to worm its way up. My hand trembles where it’s caught in Gabriel’s, but before I can voice any fear, Ronan steps in behind me and Jax flanks my other side, all warmth and gentle gravity. Their scents roll over me in one thick, anchoring current. The panic doesn’t vanish, but it’s soothed by the certainty that I’m not alone. They’re here with me. If anything happens, they’ll know what to do. If it goes wrong, they’ll catch me.
I never thought I’d say that about an Alpha, but these males aren’t any Alphas. They’re different.
Mates. The voice pipes up in my head, but the voice sounds different than it always has. It sounds likeme.
I grip Gabriel’s arm and nod. "I’m good. I want to try."
Gabriel’s smile is huge. He squeezes me to his side, then turns to open the door. The solid thunk of the lock slides home, and we slip into the hallway.
The corridor is cool and quiet, carpet swallowing our footfalls. At the end, the elevator doors slide open as we approach. Gabriel ushers me in first, Jax and Ronan flanking me on either side. Ronan still holds the basket, and the familiar scents combined with the solid presence of all three Alphas anchor me as the doors close.
The elevator jolts as we descend. I’m aware of every breath I take. Every shallow pump of my heart, and then with a soft chime, the doors open, spilling us into an empty, light-filled foyer.
Just beyond the glass floor-to-ceiling doors is a green, wild world. Sunlight filters through fresh leaves, throwing shadows over neatly mowed lawn. Pale blossoms dot the bushes, mixed with splashes of violet, cream, and blush-pink flowers. The garden is sheltered, cradled between buildings so that it’s both tucked away and open. A stone path meanders beneath the canopy, and in the far corner, a wrought-iron bench seat gleams. Birds flit through branches and I hear their muted calls where I’m rooted to the spot.
My lungs open. It’s real. Everything I need, all at once. I press my hand to the glass, breath fogging just for a moment, then I push down the handle. I step out, first one foot and then the next, carried more by longing than certainty.
My skin tingles in the crisp, sharp air, laced with green and blossom and the faintest tang of city stone. A chill sweeps across my cheeks, slips beneath my hair, settles on my skin.
My eyes close and I tilt back my head. Sunlight heats my skin, wind tickles my hair around my jaw, and leaves rustle in a slight breeze.
I drink this space in, greedy for everything it gives me. The taste is sweet and real, and my body doesn’t understand what to do with so much freedom. Awe and wonder and shock start a war inside me. I’m overwhelmed and elated, goosebumps prickling along my arms as laughter bubbles up in my throat. Ragged, unbelieving, bright with delight and fear and relief. Sudden tears sting behind my eyelids. I can’t tell if I’m about to cry, laugh, or run, or all three at once.
"It’s real. Everything I remembered. It’s real." My voice is thick. I gaze up at the males surrounding me, letting me experience without pushing anything on me. "I’m outside. I’m really outside." I sway on my feet, heart thundering with hope. "I’m really outside," I whisper again, needing to hear myself say it, needing to make it true.
Ronan catches me and his arm anchors my waist, steady and secure. I lean into him, taking in the strength in his chest and arms, the living heat of his body all around me. I’m shaking, but his touch is unwavering.
"You’re doing so well." His lips brush the crown of my head as he holds me, soft praise seeping into my skin. "Brave Omega. Braver than you know."
I tip my nose against his throat and finding nothing but honesty. He means every word.
"Do you want to go farther? Out into the garden? If you’re up for it, we’ll go as slow as you need," he says.
Joy crackles through me. I’ve waited so long for this moment. I won’t let fear win. Not now that the world is blooming open in front of me.
"You can do this, Sweetheart." Gabriel’s words chase away the doubt.
"Let me know if you want to hold my hand, Sunshine," Jax says.
