Page 45 of Cruelest Kiss and Fairest Blood
“I’ll make ye a deal. Ye get this messy swarm of birds out of the castle, and I’ll cover for you while you sneak off and do whatever it is you do out there.”
“You will?” The birds nearest to me startle as I jump to my feet.
“Be back before nightfall and don’t ye dare break any bones climbing out of that window.” She shakes her head.
Diving into her arms, I squeeze her tightly. “Thank you, thank you!”
There’s a soft knock on the door. My excitement dips.
“Go. I’ll tell them yer royal ’ighness ’as a bad case of melancholy.”
“Surely you can come up with a better excuse. They might try to heal me by dragging my ass to a royal function if you tell them that.”
“A bad case of diarrhea then? They’ll not risk touching yer royal arse if that’s the case.”
“That sounds mortifying but perfect.”
The birds follow suit as I climb from the window. The vines that run along the wall outside my room have always been thick enough to hold my weight. No one sees me as I descend, lowering myself until I land behind a wall of rose bushes.
I only have an hour before it’s dark. Not wasting any time, I hurry to my secret garden. A feeling of comfort washes over me at the sight of my many bones. “I missed you.”
The bones are silent, but some part of me feels they can understand me. I like to believe they are grateful to rest in peacesomewhere so beautiful. Most importantly, somewhere they’re not alone.
A row of white camellia bushes has burst into bloom in my absence. Their fragrant flowers fill the walls of my refuge with such a sweet perfume. The last of the day’s sun gleams off my bones. My heart feels at peace in this place. The strangeness of enjoying the company of animal skeletons over living people does not escape me. Is it the death I’m attracted to, or just the quiet? Maybe a bit of both. It’s probably the same reason I’m so attracted to Harrow.
My nerves awaken. I haven’t seen him since the chase in the labyrinth. We never got a chance to talk about things. Not that I would know what to say. Probably something along the lines of “Remember that time you turned into a monster and touched me with shadows and a super long tongue and made my body shake in ways no one ever has?” Something tells me even if the opportunity arose, I’d be too embarrassed to bring it up. Not too embarrassed to enjoy the same experience again.
The flutter that comes to life between my thighs when I think about that encounter makes my lower stomach tighten. I’m desperate to be touched like that again.
Finding a soft spot beneath a white weeping cherry tree, I adopt an elegant pose. Harrow will show up any moment.
The minutes pass in silence. My living animals do not come here. When I visit this place, it is always quiet. I listen for the flap of wings. The soft rustle of leaves in the evening breeze is all I can hear.
My heart sinks a little with every dimming ray of sun. The night creeps in. Harrow never shows.
Disappointment eats away at the joy I felt from leaving my room. I was so sure he would come.
As promised, I return before it’s fully dark. Melly gives me a tight hug. She offers me a tray of dinner. I frown at the half-eaten contents.
“It was going cold. What did ye expect?”
“Nothing less from you,” I tease.
“Do ye feel better?” Her eyes are bright with hope.
I paste on a smile. She doesn’t believe my stories about Harrow. My disappointment won’t make sense. “Much better. Thank you.”
Her grin is far brighter than mine.
Melly excuses herself to finish her evening duties. Once she’s gone, the silence of my solitude creeps in again.
Twirling a feather between my fingers, I think of Harrow. Does he fly? I’ve never seen it, but he has wings. They’re too large to be for decoration only. Flying is the only explanation for how he vanishes so quickly. It also explains how he whisked me back to the center of the maze so fast.
What if I jumped from the window. Would I sprout wings? Maybe I’d be granted wings in the afterlife. Is that where I’d find Harrow? Would I recognize him? Maybe his fascination with me would dry up after my death. I’d be just another body amongst dead things.
I’m yanked from my morbid daydreams by the sound of a familiar voice outside my door. “I’ve been given permission from the king to take the night watch.”
“It’s alright. He speaks the truth,” Gestin agrees.
